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Leisure Suit Larry: Wet Dreams Dry Twice FULL GAME with Engels subtitlesComplain, DMCA
finally the time has come
again he has awakened
everyone thought he was gone forgotten
and many said el rey
who are you talking about uh
not that important don't let me disturb
you
i'm not even here just don't pay any
attention to me
now you got me all confused
tell them who i am ah elari
the prophesied one before whom the very
alpacas themselves bowed
who saved us from the gringos i i
thought you were gonna sing about how
good i look and
how successful i am with the ladies fine
fine
before you became illari you were
larry laugher actually i
still am the man who back in the wild
80s
decided to be a virgin no more
best decision i ever made the man from
whom
no woman is safe you got that right
uh hang on i don't think you're supposed
to say that anymore
but it's true of course ladies
tell them where we are this is without a
doubt the most beautiful place on earth
wonderful can come nowhere is the sun
warmer
and the bananas more curved long did can
come
suffer under the gringo's yoke but you
elari
you set us free you blew up the gringo's
villa
well strictly speaking that was more of
an accident
we are free and a golden future lies
before us
tell them how i got here that elari is a
long
story
i have time very well you
fell out of time that's not very nice
no one knows how you got from the 1980s
to
our time oh that's what you meant
you woke up in a strange laboratory
and at first didn't know you were in the
21st
century but you quickly learned how this
modern world works
after all he had the best teacher
elefto you are larry's anchor to a
world long lost would anyone like to try
my new
recipe for craft beer no
at any rate elari you have not only
mastered the pitfalls of the 21st
century
well mastered would mean that he knew
what he was doing
and i don't think it would be fair to
say that i think he's doing all right
silencio larry looked for love in all
the wrong places elari has fallen deeply
in love with faith
the secret boss of the technology
company prune
she told him to get 90 points on the
timber dating app
only then would she go out with him how
do you know all that
you weren't even there silencio as
always that went kaka and then
larry wanted to hack the prune server to
improve his timber score
that was self-defense in the process
he disturbed a product presentation and
prune was brought to the brink of
bankruptcy yeah well
oops faith had to flee with bj in tow
the man she had installed as ceo of
prune
but who was merely her puppet
larry snuck onto their ship and secretly
sailed with them to their villa
here in beautiful cancum not one word
about what happened on that ship
oh i thought it was very romantic
ah really i'll admit
no i'm curious are you nuts lefty
never mind forget i asked larry i was
politely going to avoid mentioning
good thing that you cobbled up the most
repulsive sex doll of all time
and that you we can just imagine the
rest
unfortunately finally faith revealed her
plan
and that bj was just a puppet then
you blew up the villa driving off the
gringos
and saving can come it's a pretty crazy
story
tell them about the terrible fate faith
suffered ah
beautiful faith you were blindly in love
with her
and moved heaven and hell to win her
love well
strictly speaking she was the one who
was chasing me
you followed her here to her villa then
you blew up the villa
that was only because of the totally
messed up user interface
what did you expect when you press a big
red button anyway
the moment came where you saved her life
and she for the first time
felt something approaching affection for
you but then
she was hit by a chunk of rubble no by
the park
what that wasn't a piece of rubble from
the villa
that was the puck what do you mean puck
i greased a high strike on the pier and
you lost wages with some lube
and put the puck into orbit when i hit
it and then
all that time later it fell back to
earth and hit faith at that exact
moment exactly nobody understood that
okay let's just forget about that bit at
any rate
the puck knocked her out she fell in the
boat and the wind
swept her away and so she disappeared
from my life
i'm sure she's dead poor faith all i
have left of her are memories
could you maybe sing a song about pie if
you do that i'll delete myself
but i'd like to acknowledge that you
were always there for me you do realize
that's what i was programmed to do don't
you
yeah but we've been through so much
together
we sure have larry
do you know a song about alpacas oh
but of course
everyone calls you llama master of
holidays tasty as sausage
to wrestle you'd kill your yummy when
grilled
why am i all of a sudden hungry
whatever happened to bj he wanted to
float lefties on the stock exchange
market it as a franchise and expand
internationally
sounds like a plan then lefty beat him
with a paddle and he took off
oh i know what happened
so what now are you sure you know enough
to dive into this adventure
yes now we can get this show on the road
very well elari
yet there is still one last step
remaining to fulfill the prophecy
heralding a golden age on can come you
must marry the daughter
of the most important man on the island
my daughter i sincerely hope you haven't
forgotten
considering we're in the middle of
preparations
of course not i've been practicing
saying i do all day
good that's what i expect from my
son-in-law
then i'll go get ready for a wedding yes
go now elari marry the most beautiful
woman on the island
my daughter uh how many women are there
on the island anyway
two the other one is my mother
maybe fulfill the prophecy
and your destiny let me leave you
with this song
they call you
i caramba my guitar we have to fix it
alari
otherwise i won't be able to sing any
songs at your wedding
i'll take care of it and don't forget
that you have to take care of the
catering
and wear your wedding suit
hi what can i do for you larry there
must be some kind of app for wedding
preparations
absolutely but i'm still busy unzipping
that huge file
which means i can't install any new apps
right now
i know what unzipping huge things can be
like oh
just zip it larry that file somebody
sent us a few weeks ago
remember i'll have to decrypt it but
it'll take time
okay then let me know when it's done
larry i think you're a little confused
isn't that normal when you're about to
commit yourself to something
forever yes it is but let me remind you
again
ah elari the best and only son-in-law i
ever had
a lot of the preparations for the
wedding have already been made how do
you feel about that larry
are you really ready to make port in the
harbor of holy matrimony
if the prophecy demands it that's a good
enough reason for you
uh let's just not talk about it would
you rather talk about how you blew up
the villa
all right all right i'll never push a
big red button again
where's the ladder leading down to my
room again
oh what's wrong larry i was just
thinking about
faith again don't blame yourself i do
though
that's fate's underwear which was strewn
all over the island in the explosion
i collected all of them so uh can i give
them back to faith
as soon as possible if she's still alive
i should at least light a candle for her
actually everything i need should be
here in this room
i'm taking these it might get dark
ah there it is first of all i have to
light it
fire man's best friend
and harmless in the right hands
well it's burning now i have to put it
on top of the altar
oh faith i wish you were here
okay time to get going i still have a
lot to prepare
for the wedding wait what i still have
to check your progress in the
sensitivity class today
does it have to be now you said yourself
that you wanted to know more about how
to properly interact with other people
in the 21st century
i've already learned a lot but not
enough okay
fine so
how many genders are there
and not for everyone i've almost had
enough myself
so how many are there then the correct
answer is
gender is diverse okay if you're too
lazy to count
next question your best friend confides
that he is suffering from depression
what do you advise him to do
go out and get some fresh air oh
and that's what you would do yourself no
of course not
that's reassuring first i get myself a
whiskey
then find a woman enough already why do
i even ask
the last question for now a colleague at
work makes a sexist joke
during lunch how do you react
exactly what joke a woman goes to the
oh i mean it doesn't matter i've had
enough did i pass
let me put it this way the 21st century
isn't done with you yet
things used to be easier things didn't
used to be easier you were just more
naive
but at least back then you could say
what you thought and just what do you
think you've been doing here the whole
time
are you done unzipping that file yet i
need a wedding app
the encryption is proving hard to crack
it seems to contain some important data
some kind of secret you haven't really
been working properly ever since faith
stopped being the boss at prune either
that's not true i wonder what's happened
at the company since then
hello so
you're nari
yes you know who i am
baby yes mr wang
nice to meet you oh oh we don't have any
type of present to use
this nari is not the prune that used to
be
the peel jobs and faith prune this
this is my prune now uh
yes you're still working on the cougar
update for our pythons
i want you to release it immediately
because i have other work for you
but no buts we have a bigger more
important
project ahead of us miss faith was
working on a revolutionary software
project
a self-learning algorithm i need it for
the product
that will truly immortalize prune
one that will make even pythons obsolete
she hinted that she'd crack the
algorithm but i never saw it
i'm under pressure nari understand
well that algorithm
is sexy we have to get it
get it sweet cheeks i'll just get back
to work
as of right now you are the technical
director here at prune
if we can't find faith's algorithm our
technicians will have to develop one
themselves
like yesterday you have a free hand and
unlimited resources
do whatever you want with me uh
thanks nori yes
i can find a switch for the secret back
room
uh i have no idea what you're talking
about
there has to be something like that
somewhere around here a room with a
heart-shaped bed
that spins uh with a back entrance for
anyone i
invite i'll um i'll check up on that
directly with the uh property manager
and i'll get the cougar update rolled
out
in my old office all i had to do was
press a button under my desk and poof
there it was that was nice by the time
i'm done with prune
i'll have that here too
by the way larry yeah if you want to
remember certain things that you can't
take with you
you can take photos of them instead very
funny
do i look like i have a camera on me i
have a camera
you what do you think that hole on the
back is for well
forget i asked so you can photograph
everything yes and then show it to you
as if you were carrying it with you hmm
how
practical you could have told me that
earlier oh
i could use it to take a picture of
something pretty specific
but you need a wide angle lens for
something that size i have
um yes larry i have to say it's too bad
i don't have one of those
phew oh
i'm sure it'll work anyway larry no
done now yeah thanks for asking but you
might just want to take pictures of
things that might be useful later
my head's starting to spin pie isn't
there some way i can keep better track
of everything i have to do
i'm glad you asked i installed a to-do
app for you
can't i have that timber thing again we
decided to uninstall that app as part of
your
sensitivity training for your own good
that was a stupid idea
anyway the app lists everything you
still need to do for the wedding
and you'll be there to check off
everything that's done of course
whenever you finish any of your
outstanding tasks i'll show you
so
i always say lube don't leave home
without it
is that a self-destruct mechanism that
works twice
that was lucky
now the self-destruct button just
self-destructed
uh i don't know what i'm supposed to do
with it but
you never know
oh hello
i still have a few questions about the
wedding yes
what else do i still have to do well i
need to be able to play a song at the
wedding
but one of the guitar strings is broken
all of the guests
need to be fed you must wear your finest
wedding suit
when all this has been done we will
celebrate
a wedding
can i at least talk to your daughter
once before the wedding
no that is strictly forbidden why
because it's
uh bad luck for whom
how many women got lucky by talking to
you so uh
why don't we talk about something else
what does a wedding have to do with the
prophecy uh
it's all in the old scriptures they are
very complicated
it takes years of work to understand
them oh i was just curious
it's not like you're setting your
daughter up with me just because the
opportunity presented itself
because of american citizenship or
anything
of course not
couldn't we just enter a cohabitation
agreement oh
no that just causes confusion with the
tax classes
any tips for the wedding night
is she the athletic type
does she already know all the tricks or
well i have to explain
some of them to her
why aren't you talking why are you still
talking
enough about the wedding
still mad at the gringos so
mad except with you of course elari
but as my son-in-law you'll be one of us
anyway
not some gringo i didn't even feel
gringoey anymore
i forgot what happened there at the end
again
then i'll sum it up for you
again by some mysterious means you were
transported from the 1980s to our time
you fell in love with the boss of the
technology company prune
and tried to win her favor by earning
enough points in the timber dating app
you drove the company to the brink of
ruin
and followed faith here then you blew up
faith's villa
and the explosion blew her out to sea on
a ship
she's been missing and presumed dead
ever since
the way you tell it i come off way too
bad you don't even want to know what you
got up to in a parallel universe
catch you later ally el rey
ah thanks hilari a g
string for my guitar now i can
sing my song at your wedding somehow it
feels good to check something off
almost as good as timber now
ola hello
catch you later alright
this suit is freshly starched if i pull
it out through the bars it'll be ruined
i can wiggle my finger in there as much
as i want but neither my finger nor the
lock will get anything out of it
ola hello
do you know where i can get the key to
my clothes closet ah
elari i've already given you the one key
the key to your destiny
i melted down the gold from the tombs of
my ancestors
committed this sacrilege only to make
that key out of it a key that
holds all our destinies you still have
it
right
a shark tried to bite me and i had to
use it to lock its jaw all right
i can understand that so the one
key is lost the key of destiny
born of the gold of my ancestors
irrecoverable
good thing i have another one here
oh thanks
catch you later alright
oh what's that what's wrong larry
is that the bride the bride is el rey's
daughter
maybe he adopted the donkey try being a
little more tolerant and above all
stop being so simple-minded
cans with strings on them i used to play
telephone with those as a kid
looks useful it's mine now
it looks a little limp but i can fix
that hey
that's what your women usually say to
you
larry
how's business i can't complain of
course
it helps to be the only restaurant on
the whole island
most of my customers became regulars
once they stopped tossing their cookies
let me guess you came up with a new
recipe for your barbarian brew
larry it's an art you don't just
come up with something like that but you
can't throw up with something like that
whatever happened to bj he wanted to
become my partner in lefties
thought it could be built into a
franchise a lefties
in every city and all that different
types of barbarian brew for different
target groups
i convinced him it wasn't a good idea
with market research data with a paddle
then he disappeared
no idea what happened to him don't
really care either
you think the wedding's a good idea sure
i'll take care of the catering
i mean i i haven't even met the bride
yet you have to look on the bright side
that means the bride hasn't met you yet
what are you trying to say
hmm i'm saying you two are probably a
dream
couple oh okay
can you feed all the wedding guests i
could but i can't prepare any alpaca
meat while the meat grinder's stuck
can't you do that without alpaca meat
vegan maybe
el rey says that the the prophecy
forbids it just like everything else
i gotta be going see you later then
you can never have enough plastic
bottles
most people have no idea that plastic
bottles are not all the same
they're made of different plastics for
different uses
it's actually really fascinating
lefty i left though can i please
borrow your pizza peel you mean you take
it and i never see it again
he's on to you go ahead take it i'm
experimenting with flatbread anyway
rusty or it's got some bone chips stuck
in it it's hard to say
the crank now turns again
now it turns again
the pizza peel fits perfectly into the
fork of the branch
now that's our real kissing mouth
so
ah it fits
good idea but that won't work
those two things won't work together
so i'll put on my wedding suit
ah it fits perfectly oh
and the one key from el rey is in the
pocket too
great at least he won't kill me for
losing it somehow it feels good to check
something off
almost as good as timber now
okay i'll just get changed again
so
ola hello
catch you later alright
so i'll put on my wedding suit
ah it fits perfectly somehow it feels
good
to check something off almost as good as
timber now
so
larry
can you feed all the wedding guests of
course
the meat grinder's working again so
everything's set for the wedding
somehow i don't know i just can't really
get all
excited about it what's wrong larry it
all feels wrong
that's how everyone feels before they
say yes you're probably right
i'll just go back to my room for now
larry what's up remember that file that
was sent to you a few weeks ago what was
that about again
you received an encrypted file from an
unknown number and i started decrypting
it in the background
oh that file what about it i decrypted
it
ah so i can install the wedding app now
the file was from faith
what her picture was in the file too
that's faith when exactly was that
picture taken
the day after the house exploded she
survived
but where is she now the photo also
shows gps coordinates from the open
ocean
pie we have to go there right away
coordinate
save to the map can you swim i'd rather
try using a boat
there was more in the file what else hmm
it's some complex program code i don't
understand myself
i'll analyze it
what's happening to you i i don't know
what about that program code it
disappeared what do you mean
disappeared i don't understand it either
maybe it was just an update for my
software whatever
i have to find faith all i have to do is
make sure that el rey doesn't marry me
off right away
otherwise i'll never get off the island
hi where can i find a boat on the island
hi everything okay
uh of course a boat nowhere
bj's yacht was repossessed and the
locals don't want to leave
then i'll have to build one myself well
anyone who can catch a rat with a condom
can definitely build a raft
let's see if there's anything underneath
it yes
okay i'll release the brakes
i should be able to move it now
i was right it can be moved
quite a wave as a matter of fact
i'll just take that
i'm sure i'll need that
okay
yo ho ho and not a bottle of rum
look pie this is a blueprint for a raft
i think it's from a survival magazine
maybe i can use it to make something
wait i'm installing a blueprint app for
you
you can use it to build complicated
things
okay i think i've got it i define which
object has to be used as what
then i press the start button and then
that's how it will be done
but only if everything fits
enough
it's all sticky and green of course i'm
gonna take it
isn't it beautiful hi dubby wilson
a man's name wilma i meant wilma
i'm sure that tabletop would be useful
but i can't carry it around with me
i'll take a picture of it
oh it broke off
say ah
the more the merrier
um
hmm
now isn't that one impressive boat uh
well let's say it's mostly above water
i baptize you
floating mcfloatface the raft does not
deserve that
do you want to set sail now uh during
long boat trips i
might need something to help pass the
time i wish i lacked imagination
we're good to go now wilma will keep me
company
should i just put myself down but just
think of all the things
you'll miss i'll take that as a yes
pretty boring trip are you complaining
i'm so glad i had wilma with me is she
your new best friend
no of course not you are
ah it's a shame that you don't have a
body well
nothing i can do about that oh and i
even went and made a head
you don't imagine me looking like that
do you
absolutely not so faith was here
there's nothing but wreckage i'm
locating her pie phone
it's very close there it is
i hope yes it's still working
it's rebooting
it's logged into the net weak signal but
it's re-establish a wireless connection
the battery still has a bit of charge
left but not much
then you should talk to her quickly
maybe my colleague knows where faith is
why yeah sure
yeah pie pie pie
can you tell me where faith is faith
faith cheme
take out that white crab you're blinding
me pie
what's wrong with her the salty seawater
corroded her wiring and then the
loneliness of being shipwrecked
poor pie but uh
larry i think we have another problem
it'll have to wait
we need to find out what happened to
faith here hi yes
not you the other one save pie can you
locate faith
that would be a no larry there's
something you should know
yeah i know we have to fix this pie
no that's not what i mean what then your
life is in danger because a storm is
coming
what should i do now my security
protocol says to throw out a life
preserver
i don't have one then hold on tight to
something
what i'm still expecting delivery of the
4k surveillance cameras for the offices
i just can't believe prune never used to
have anything like that
larry yes let the delivery guys in
that's not the doorbell the signal's
coming
from faith's pie phone so
but that could mean she's still alive
you mean
we could still get our hands on her
secret project
i mean she's still alive and we can
rescue her
yes whatever as long as i can find out
what the deal was with that algorithm
she was working on
and where she hid it where's the signal
coming from
deep in the caribbean far south of
cancum where she disappeared
i have just the right person for this
job
i'm calling the subspace
penetrator the what commander yanmai
reporting i have an assignment for you
i'm ready for anything would you also
have
sex during a parabolic flight
that's not what i meant you don't have
to
well not for now
i'm relaying the signal we're picking up
this is the python
from a miss faithless proceed to its
source immediately
and investigate the situation if faith
is still
alive bring her here or whatever you can
find of her
she's the only one who can tell us where
she stole the algorithm
confirmed scanning frequencies for the
signal
receiving signal excellent full trust
authorized
stay in the shadows commander yanmai and
when the time is right
really let it read just what exactly do
you mean
you know do what needs to be done crack
down that kind of thing
oh what's that everything okay there
no i'm done don't worry larry that's
just one of the tame sex slaves just
shoot him back under the desk
pruning waters out
oh
what i survived the storm
but where am i now
this doesn't look like can come to me oh
hi what are you okay i think so
systems analysis no water damage cougar
updates still running
what about faith pie hello hi i've seen
things you people wouldn't believe
what's wrong pulsating pectorals
off the shoulder of orion larry she's
dying
i watched c-sections in the dark
near the tan studio gate is there
anything i can do to help
all those orgasms will be lost
in time like tears in rain
no larry time to go offline
she has passed into the realm of the
eternal offline
oh i'll bury her here
that's very compassionate of you so i
won't tell you that the salt water will
release toxins from the device
okay i'm stranded on some island the
jungle looks impenetrable
my ship is a total wreck
i'll die here for sure relax
larry now you just have to do what you
always do
i let my cosmopolitan appearance do the
talking you mean you're going to take
your pants off
nobody knows my talents better than you
no larry
you're not going to do that as always
you're going to wander around aimlessly
taking anything that's not tied down
true
that's my specialty i can still do the
rest anyway
someday you're gonna have to learn how
hi are you okay think so
that's ha that's definitely
fate's underwear
she was here i'm on the right track but
that could also be part of the sale
no these are freshly worn i have a keen
sense of smell i wish i could doubt that
but where did she go
hi are you thinking what i'm thinking
that you're not pitfall harry
no but i am pit for larry
oh
that looks impenetrable oh come on
when has a thick bush ever stopped you
hey which one of us does the dirty jokes
larry
equal rights so that's what it's coming
to well then i
guess i'll plunge into the jungle there
won't be any
snakes there right no the spiders ate
them all
spiders they're just as scared of you as
you
are of them but they have more legs and
eyes
okay nothing for it
pretty dark here oh
i just touched something slimy now is
not the time for you to fiddle around
with your hand in your pants
very funny what did i just step
on nothing to be afraid of if it was an
aggressive animal it would have bitten
off your foot by now
i i i can't see anything anymore
the jungle is it's so dense
what was that oh i'm gonna die
here oh i'm gonna die in this jungle
bury me at the bend of the river
tell my unborn children
oh what a coincidence
i was just about to point out to you
that there's a hotel here and you don't
have to die
how long have you known about this place
oh
only since we got to the island can you
call up any information about this hotel
today's kahlua resort and spa hotel was
opened in 1982
as the brezhnev oasis it was considered
a popular holiday
destination for high-ranking soviet
military personnel
and their families rumors of a secret
kgb base on the island
are just vicious propaganda spread by
the capitalist west
so that's what it says about the hotel
on the internet yes
then i'm sure it's correct i should head
into the hotel
i bet there's lots of hot chicks walking
around in the spa you're looking for
faith larry she's one hot chick too yeah
hello hello
are you okay why wouldn't i be okay i'm
doing just fine
but you don't look too healthy what
healthy as a horse i can run a
marathon right here right now want me to
hear me too
don't do that okay then later
i'm larry larry laffer hello larry
my name's kip you're the bellhop not
just that
i'm gonna get you a little pick-me-up
you mean
red gummy bears are you insane you sort
those out and throw them in the shredder
otherwise they combine at night to form
a single gigantic gummy bear
huh sure but what i actually meant was
oh forget it you're not the type
what is this hotel this place used to be
the most popular holiday destination for
the richest people in the soviet union
they all flew here to have a good time
here they had
everything they wanted total luxury but
that was a while ago
so what happened in the 90s this
disgusting real estate shark from the
usa wanted to buy everything and bring
it all up to date yet a ton of companies
working here but never paid their bills
and everything blew up then you wanted
to turn it into a casino instead
a businesswoman from around here bought
the whole island and proclaimed herself
governor she's been trying to make the
hotel a hit place again for a few years
but between you and me without success
what's her name and where can i find her
bobby marley
she's usually in her office upstairs we
can take the elevator up to her
have you seen a pretty blonde named
faith around here we had a pretty blonde
here a few weeks ago i don't know her
name
because she didn't even know it herself
that could be faith
is she still here i haven't seen her for
a while maybe the boss lady knows more
damn i have to find out where she is
i think i lost my raft in the storm you
came here on a raft
yeah from camp come damn that's a long
way away
what can i say i'm just a real sea dog
okay that'll do me for now so i'm
supposed to talk to this bobby marley
maybe she knows where faith is now
where's that
elevator
so
control come in yanmai reporting yes
where are you the signal from faith's
iphone was lost in a storm but it turned
up on an archipelago but then the signal
disappeared
did you find faith no she's not here
but a man showed up at the signal source
a man hmm
he seems to have grabbed faith's pyphone
maybe he knows what happened to face
keep a close eye on him we'll get
results faster if i use my award-winning
interrogation techniques
i just have to be careful not to use the
thigh squeezer right away
that guy in the white suit looks like
he'd break in half if i did
not yet but if it should prove necessary
confirmed have you ever rubbed one of
your interrogation subjects down with
cream
and then had mongolian cows lick it off
uh no would that maybe be a thing
i'll think about it when i find a
mongolian cow
although that's not such a bad idea
yes what is it
hi um are you the new pianist good thing
i can't take lewis's tinkling away at
the keyboard any longer
or are you the new waiter we'll
definitely have to do something about
the outfit
i wait is that a wedding suit do you
want to get married here
oh i so what the hell do you want
my name is larry larry laffer
well i'm bobby marley governor of kahlua
and owner of this hotel
i was stranded here on my raft after the
storm we found a pile of dirt
and junk on the beach we had to evacuate
the area and some guests got a rash
while bathing in the sea
so you're responsible for this
was the junk pile kind of raft shape so
you admit it
well i kind of lost control of the
steering in that hurricane
then by the power of my office i am
forced to condemn you
what you deliberately polluted the
waters of kahlua the garbage you brought
here has already been collected
and recycled in addition you are hereby
fined ten thousand dollars
until such time as you have paid this
amount you will not be allowed to leave
the island
where can i lodge a complaint with me i
want to launch a complaint
lodged
i'm looking for a woman named faith
doesn't sound familiar
tall and blonde and she's totally into
me well
at least the first bit rings a bell she
was also washed up after a storm i put
her up in a room here i
felt sorry for her but then she
disappeared without a trace i don't know
what happened to her
damn but faith was here she must have
left some traces on this island
i'm trapped on the island fined and my
rats being held for ransom
if you want to sum it up like that
um maybe i could pay the fine
some other way we already have enough
dishwashers then i guess i'll head out
and
try to find the money just one moment
what
since you're here anyway i'm really
under a lot of stress at the moment and
it's been a long time since i've had a
gentleman here for a visit
if you know what i mean
you want me to look for one down in the
lobby definitely not
okay you seem to be the kind of person
one has to be direct with
my loins are ready to receive your lance
in an act of fiery passion
will you join with me in wild beastial
sex
is that a trick question i've had to
neglect my sexual desires for a while
now
too much work too much stress too few
men on the island
i understand you just can't resist my
charm
you're here right now and seem to have
time that's good enough for me too
then i better take off my clothes oh
let me undress you and feel your heat
hang on a minute
there's something wrong here what
usually women want me to do something
for them before they have sex with me
do you want me to get you something to
eat first or something
or do i have to fix something do i have
to deliver a letter to the other end of
the world for you before you get naked
stop talking and get over here
oh
baby that was
delicious with a pleasant finish if you
think so
you were okay come back in a few hours
and we can pick up where we left off
what again you mean you can't
my larry needs a break then he'll have
had a break
that we'll have to do so uh i guess my
debt with you is all
squared up now what did you slip me the
cash during sex
apparently not but i mean i made you
happy
doesn't that count you can go now come
back with the money and remember that
you can't leave the island
i i don't know how i'm supposed to feel
now please think about it outside
headquarters did you find out anything
about the man
he went to see the island's governor i
listened at the door and heard him ask
about
faith excellent uh anyway
where is faith now apparently the
governor doesn't know either
i'm going to stick close to this larry
guy and when he finds her
i'll strike but what's the deal with
this larry guy
why is he looking for faith i'll find
out
but one thing is certain he seems to
have an irresistible charm
and excellent seduction skills he
managed to get the governor into bed
with
just a few words he could be a secret
agent
one of the best fascinating keep me in
the loop without faith we'll never find
that algorithm yanmai out
wait yes have you ever obtained a
confession by tickling the souls of a
prisoner's feet with a kakapo feather
i can't remember ever having done that
before remind me
to send you a cockapoo filthy little
biters
i'm looking forward to that
larry tell me why did you just let her
jump you like that
well i mean i just wanted to be nice
aren't you supposed to be looking for
faith tell me
are you jealous not in the least all
right then the cougar update has just
completed
all apps are now available as usual new
feature
you can now talk to me whenever you want
just start the newly installed pi
app nice so you can't play death anymore
when i want to talk to you
sure looks that way
pi yes
bobby's nice isn't she because
she doesn't waste any time and just has
sex with you right away
oh we have the same definition of nice
oh
that should provide me with some
interesting information
so
hey bobby what's up larry
so uh how about it huh
ready for a little more larry loving not
now
i just ate but don't go too far away i'm
pretty spontaneous
as far as that's concerned you know i
noticed that
how am i supposed to pay off the fine
now come up with the money
and you're a free man but i don't have
that much money and
i have to get off the island tough luck
larry
there aren't any other ships sailing the
area at the moment either hardly anyone
has dropped anchor here since that whole
debacle with the festival
the what some guy showed up on the
island a couple of weeks ago
said he wanted to change things he had a
ton of ideas on how to make this island
the biggest attraction in the south seas
good idea but he said he needed to
attract a target group
that would otherwise never see the light
of day some sci-fi nerds
he called it a galactic festival
what a loser i should have known that
wouldn't work
weren't there any sponsors he said he
wanted to have it sponsored after the
fact i should have suspected something
at that point
no if that was all it had been he
brought all kinds of influencers big and
small to the island promised them
a unique exotic galactic festival but he
managed to
totally screw it all up no decent tents
not enough beds rotten food adulterated
booze
when all the influencers got here they
thought that they would be seeing hit
bands and big stars but then there were
only actors from some
cheesy low-budget movies who would ever
have suspected that a supporting actor
from orangu raptor versus murano
just wouldn't be that exciting and
that's when the rioting started at least
the tents didn't burn that long
the next day everyone was evacuated
except for this
one influencer a travel blogger now
she's complaining about everything and
and really ruining the hotel's
reputation
she only gave us two stars on gulp and
that
is affecting our bookings i don't know
what her problem is but i can't kick her
out either because she insists on
getting everything this guy promised her
at the festival
if i ever get my hands on him again who
was it the guy who ran that tech company
bj oh you know him
never hurt him well if you do run into
him
ignore his ideas thanks i'll definitely
keep that in mind
if you can take care of that travel
blogger we're even
just make sure she gives us the full
five stars on gulp right
i'll take care of it
how do i get my raft back i don't care
emma takes care of all the junk that
washes up here
i have to leave this island maybe you'll
just disappear without a trace
like many of the other guests what uh i
mean
once you get settled in you'll never
want to leave again
can i go into faith's hotel room what do
you want to go in there for
i want to find out what happened to her
okay
you seem to have quite an interest in
her i don't have time to deal with stuff
like that
ask kip the guy in the lobby thanks
i have to be going
everything you need for a hearty
hangover breakfast can i have some of
that
i think i'm gonna have a hangover soon
too help yourself
can i take the snake it's dead isn't it
go ahead
but be careful this species is notorious
for its ability to hold a lot of
poisonous venom
even after death
go ahead take one larry as a reward for
the union of our flesh
earlier wow thanks
i'll take one
i like blue
a meat fork don't leave home without it
i don't want to juice my hand or any
other part of my body at least not with
this
i i don't want to juice my hand or any
other part of my body
at least not with this
i'd better not put anything in there
freshly pressed is always the best
juicy and poisonous
i'll take one
uh yes yes
i want to know something about you what
how did you end up here on the island to
be perfectly honest i don't really
remember
i was a waiter on a cruise ship it ran
into a storm
i just wanted to go out for a quick
smoke then everything got wet and i woke
up on this beach
luckily bobby was looking for a new
bellhop what happened to the last one
oh i reckon that tribe of cannibals got
him cannibals
not funny at all
can you carry my luggage what luggage
good point
not enough about you
what kind of people do you have staying
here at the moment oh they're all kind
of weird i try to stay away from them
but you're the bellhop
yeah that makes it a little awkward we
got one of those influencers here right
now
she's terrible she's always wanting free
stuff wouldn't give me a tip but she
said she'd do an instagram story on me
and that would make me famous ugh who
else works here uh louis
mainly he thinks he's a comedian he may
have been a big shot once in lost wages
but then he made jokes about a group
that got outraged
bobby told me to ask you if i could go
into faith's room face which one is she
have you seen a woman named faith around
here huh who's that supposed to be
a beautiful woman that doesn't really
help me now either
can you describe her in a little more
detail sure
so uh she
she's tall and slender and okay riser
blue her hair is
short and blonde let me think what was
she wearing
um
a tight purple dress well the way you
describe her
oh right i remember her where is she she
was totally confused
she just up and disappeared and you have
no idea what happened to her
nope honestly no idea a lot of people
just disappear around here
i'll just be gone now
i don't think i can get a key just like
that
there's nothing there to take say what's
the deal with that box
it's the key to the toilet in the jungle
and where's the key now
i lost on the beach somewhere where
exactly somewhere down by the rosy palms
there
aren't any rosy palms then i don't
remember
there's nothing there to take say what's
it's the key and where's the lesson
somewhere down there oh then i don't
remember
uh yes yes
do you have the key to the bathroom in
the jungle i lost on the beach somewhere
where exactly somewhere down by the rosy
palms there
aren't any rosy palms then i don't
remember
i'll just be gone now
i can't just walk past it
camp huh who said i was kid where where
are they no one said anything
do i look like kip to you uh yes i'm dip
dip don't forget it don't tell anyone
are you really sure you're not kip i'm
not
chip but i don't want to talk about him
he could be in league with them
are you uh okay you want to fight me
no you wanna fight me the guy yesterday
said he didn't want to either but then
he did
he hit me as soon as i jumped him guy
was totally out of control
completely nuts are you one of those two
i'm a pacifist i like the atlantic ocean
better i'm not gonna beat you up about
it
easy there why are you so nervous i'm
not nervous
my eyes have been opened there was this
guy at the festival who gave me a flyer
about chemtrails maybe the lizard men
are behind it
uh okay sure at any rate we gotta stay
alert me
i drink as much coffee as i can the
stuff from the buffet over there really
kicks
i haven't slept in four days no one
would ever guess
what kind of drinks do you have whatever
the heart desires freshly purified
spring water
that's it there hasn't been a single
ship dock here since that festival
flopped now we are literally sitting
high and dry but i still have a little
insider tip
my non-alcoholic whiskey insider tip
because nobody wants it
okay it's not doing as well as i
expected i used to be known for my
special cocktail
the tiki twister but i can't whip one up
without the ingredients even if that
weird influencer chick keeps whining
about how much she wants one
i'd like a tiki twister well like i said
i just can't make you one but i could
give you the recipe
i'll scan it into your blueprint app
larry
it won't help you much because you can't
get the ingredients so
guess we'll see
by the way something you should know
the water here tastes kind of funny i'm
not crazy
by the way something you should know the
cake
is a lie they're everywhere
by the way something you should know the
latest surveillance chips are so small
you can't even feel them under your skin
really by the way
something you should know is that
someone standing behind you
i tell you they're after me
by the way something you should know
they
stopped you from getting that promotion
what
by the way something you should know i
overheard
someone talking about you on the beach
really
by the way something you should know
they'll never let you leave this island
again
i'm not crazy by the way
something you should know you really
believe they were your parents
i tell you they're after me by the way
something you should know hey is that
someone up there with binoculars
what by the way
something you should know there's some
weird stuff about you on the internet
they're everywhere
by the way something you should know is
that someone standing behind you
really so
i'm off i'm going now but i'll be nearby
none of us are really here
enough
hey becky you you
you do remember me you bet i remember
you poison her hey that was all a
complete misunderstanding
don't you lie to me don't come near me
or i'll call security
i haven't seen any security on the
island at all are they gone too
oh total downer that wasn't a festival
that was a festive fail festival that
sci-fi
festival all the most famous actors and
stars on a tropical island
you can't have an event like that
without becky butter because no matter
what the people write on twitter
i am not the puke queen and that's all
your fault
you ruined my image i thought the
festival would allow me to upgrade my
brand credibility
with some fresh authenticity and then
this all turns out to be a big scam
then why didn't you leave i thought
now you're here you'll just have to make
the best of it so now i'm a travel
blogger
how does that work oh you travel the
world and let the finest hotels spoil
you
you take cool pictures and sometimes you
even write four sentences
that's hard work live your life i always
say
so how do you like the island it's okay
it's a little
old school but i like it vintage uh
if only there was a yacht floating
around here where i could take bikini
pictures
i trained extra to be able to stick my
butt out like this
uh but this hotel i don't know i gave it
like an ultra low rating on gulp
i mean it deserved it
do travel bloggers really get everything
for free of course
that's how it should be too after all
our commitment gives the hotels like
total exposure
as opposed to those bagpackers what a
bunch of scammers
how did you rate the hotel on gulp only
two out of five stars
why the pool water is uh it's
filthy and stinks i can't lounge in the
water if they can't even see my body
it should be tropical blue and smell
fresh
and the buffet is disgusting full of
meat and stuff
i need organic vegan food that keeps me
balanced
what will my community think if they see
me eating dead animals
and the bar has water and non-alcoholic
whiskey
ugh how am i supposed to take a selfie
with one of those
i'd look like some kind of caveman i
need a super
colorful impressive cocktail one that's
totally selfie suitable i mean i'd give
another star just for that
otherwise my authenticity as an
influencer would be ruined
have you seen a pretty blonde around
here anywhere i can't focus my attention
on other people
i mean my community doesn't care about
them they want to see
me
should i get you something to drink now
go away
i have to go influence somewhere else
now
wow aren't those some nice
flowers oh thank you i pick them myself
and arrange them according to the
vividness of their colors this way
they ensure a balanced mental state
seems to work
i'm larry laffer my name is shauni
nice hotel huh as a matter of fact
yeah you don't sound too excited about
that well i was supposed to be gone
already
but it's not that easy why are you still
here
i followed the stars when i heard that
there was this
legendary cavern of cosmic cognition
here and i knew
this was where i had to go this cave
seems to be nothing but a legend
but the journey is the reward i always
say
are you one of those travel bloggers do
i look like one of those
i didn't mean to offend you then you
need to be careful
travel bloggers are the scum of the
earth let the hotel
spoil them and then rave on instagram
about how great their holiday is
that sounds horrible it really is
rich kids i'm sorry i asked it's okay
they're just people too
i was wondering if you'd like to support
my travels
how with money everything here is so
expensive
really i haven't paid for anything yet
oh
are you a backpacker too
a backpacker i always take my bags with
me how
else would i pack anything that's not
what i meant bagpacking
is a great and sustainable way to get to
see the whole world
sounds great how does it work you ask
other people for support on your own
spiritual path no
i describe my experiences exude positive
thoughts
then i get some money and continue my
journey
i'm sure you must have a lot of pleasant
encounters yeah
totally although yes some people
just aren't very understanding quite a
few actually unbelievable
but doesn't that kind of traveling
really take it out of you you always
have to overnight as cheaply as possible
yeah it can be a little annoying the
last few nights i slept on the beach
it was nice under the stars and the
gentle breeze and everything but what i
wouldn't give for a night in a real
bed especially with the right person
you even notice that yourself right
quiet pie
how are you doing now pretty well i'm
living on sunlight because you still
haven't got any money it's the
vibrations around here
people get so much positive energy for
me for their money that should be worth
something to them
i just can't understand that but i
admit it would be nice to sleep in a
real bed again
instead of in the sand
can you stand why should i because it
gives you a different perspective on the
world
plus it's good for the circulation
especially when you have legs as long as
mine
thanks i'm quite happy down here
can i have one of those blow lights sure
i don't need it anymore
i don't know why they're even still
glowing they usually frayed pretty
quickly
my skin's all red when i wear them too i
don't care
i have bad skin anyway okay here you go
have you seen a pretty blonde anywhere
no well
apart from myself don't you think that
would apply to me too
absolutely
catch you later may the light show you
the way wanderer
ah thanks you too
hey that's my raft that's junk and it's
going to be recycled
hi i'm larry larry laffer
hi i'm emma lovely man thanks
are you a messy what well because you
can't seem to throw anything away
all you have to do is throw it in the
ocean and it'll float away
practical are you trying to provoke me
what absolutely not it sure seems that
way
you may be too young for it but you seem
a lot like one of those guys who's
responsible for the state the world is
in
guys who did everything right in the 80s
okay boomer i don't have a boomerang
what did you do to my raft your what
there
in that net wait you threw that piece of
junk in the water
that's not junk that's outstanding
engineering
i already complained to governor marley
about that she wanted to find the
culprit and hit him with a heavy fine
so it was you don't worry she already
found me and
man did she find me
now give me back my raft not a chance
i will not allow this raft to deface
these beautiful waters again
i could actually hear the quotation
marks
what are you doing here anyway i am an
environmental activist
wherever nature gets polluted i am there
to save it
and that just coincidentally happens to
be the nature on a tropical island
you see the kind of junk people throw in
the water here stop calling my beautiful
raft a piece of junk
never how'd you find my raft so quickly
i've placed sensors
all over kahlua water temperature wind
ph values
solar radiation i can monitor everything
here from my control center
in real time plus i've set up a few
cameras on the island
sounds like you don't miss much i never
sleep i comb the beach with a metal
detector the things i find there
some people even just bury their old
consumer electronics
what monsters
i want to report some serious pollution
what where
there's a guy driving around in an suv
on the other side of the island
well i can't save the whole world right
now i'm only taking care of this part of
the island
that's a double standard no it's
pragmatism
someone at the hotel has a plastic bag
that is a structural problem in our
society
and the government has to step up to the
plate so now it's suddenly the
government's responsibility
that's what i said
someone's swimming naked down at the
beach that's not pollution
it is visually besides they might be in
it
i've got bigger threats to the
environment to deal with
i made a mistake everything's clean
you didn't by any chance find a key
somewhere near the hotel did you
yes i have how exactly on one of my
patrols with the metal detector i was
going to take it back to the governor
oh i can do that for you i'm going back
to the hotel anyway
that would be great here
have you by any chance seen a pretty
blonde anywhere
i try to avoid people as much as
possible i try to avoid people as much
as possible
her name is faith ring any bells no
i have to be going
can i have the magnet sure now that i
have my metal detector
i don't need it anymore
oh do you want to dispose of that
properly
thanks just be sure to put them in a
lockable container otherwise
some poor animal might get caught in it
the ducky fits perfectly like all it
needs now is a partner in there
i can't reach the bottom of the well
with my hand
i managed to fish out a quarter but then
the magnet fell in
how unexpected there's trash in it
it's a tin foil hat always useful
there's nothing left in there that i
could use
i think it's fully automatic
i should try the opening
the water is just like me it needs a
little color
hello looks like no one's in there
but it's locked
it fits
that should make everything smell a bit
better
okay let's see
i just went maybe later
those two things won't work together
hello occupied
i gotta go it's urgent are you a monster
i am the spirit of perpetual affirmation
oh no
ah are you gonna be out soon i'm still
outside the year
is 2020 a.d alas the skies are green
with plutonium
interest rates are doubling annually the
world has become weird and bizarre
look down there the island i'm up here
with the birds
birds cheerio
what's your problem i don't have a
problem i can stop whenever i want are
you sure
at any rate i can't leave until the
monster's gone
you can come out it's just me out here
you could be the monster in disguise i
can't
take the chance besides the colors are
so beautiful here in this villa
you're in a toilet it's bigger on the
inside
are you sure you're okay who are you
anyway clyde don't tell my brother i'm
here otherwise you'll want the pills
back who's your brother
kip the bellhop he's a jerk your
secret's safe with me
then i'll stop bothering you you sound
pretty far gone already
i just went maybe later
i just went that's fine
no
i'll hang that up there
ah
did you see that pie that horny
actually fell
for the sexy rubber ducky forgot
absolutely
everything around him and just blindly
threw himself on it what a
indeed nothing like that could ever
happen to you
larry of course not
me
so let's see
there's no lever
that's a perfect fit and now it's a
working lever again
that bridge the gap
so
hmm that didn't work
hmm that didn't work
i have to admit it's a clever way to get
rid of waste oil out of sight out of
mind
that is your motto
so let's see
so let's see
so let's see
hmm that didn't work
so
so let's see
so
so
fly free you swine is that your way of
looking after animals
that's the jungle out there i'm sure
it'll land softly
and the sea is over that way too uh
say can things actually swim
is there anyone around no
this stays between us capisce
remember bird this is all for a good
cause
you mean yours that's what i said
so let's see
hmm that didn't work
i really don't need any coffee right now
okay this will reverse the effects of
the coffee
so let's see
uh yes yes
i'll just be gone now
hey bobby what's up larry
can i go into faith's hotel room what do
you want to go in there for
i'm just looking for more of her
underwear why not
people collect the strangest things i
don't have time to deal with stuff like
that
ask kip the guy in the lobby thanks
i have to be going
i already have one and that'll do
the hot water would probably melt the
cup
then i'll just go on in
so
oh this is where i found that yellow
liquid
i'll take one
yes yes
bobby told me to ask you if i could go
into faith's room sure
i mean seeing how you know this face
chick so well sure thing
and go ahead i'm sure it's okay i think
so too
room 404 the elevator will take you up
there thanks
i'll just be gone now
so let's see
this air conditioner is driving me crazy
sometimes too hot sometimes too cold
okay go ahead and take it i don't need
it anymore
so
i failed it
i want to report some serious pollution
what where
there's a poor bird caught in an oil
spill near the hotel
what they'll have to take care of it
immediately yes
don't touch anything while i'm gone okay
of course not i don't want to
accidentally pollute the environment
i won't get it down like that
okay let's see
hi can we go the raft isn't seaworthy
yet the sail didn't survive
we need a new means of propulsion the
sea is very treacherous here
so we need something like an outboard
motor we still don't know where faith is
we should find that out first you still
have to pay bobby that fine
we're not allowed to leave the island
until we do i'll take care of it
and once again larry laffer has
successfully improvised
the perfect drive for my raft
headquarters yes i've got some new intel
on this larry laffer
i'm listening he seems to be some kind
of mechanical genius
he built something out of the simplest
materials he is able to combine
two things that don't really belong
together then
he ends up with something that he can
use for a purpose
for which it was never even intended the
man
is incredible yan mai that sounds like
he's either too
much for you or you admire him
nonsense i would love to strangle him
with my own hands
and bury the pieces of his body in a
rice field yes
strangle him shaggle him until he can't
breathe
at just the right time and when he no
longer can be
i understand thanks
this is her room how can you be so sure
do you recognize something
no it's her scent unmistakably
i hope they never install olfactory
sensors in me
now i'm a gold member
i'll take that
so
let's see how long it takes for the
water to freeze
now he's not paying attention
a quarter still
there's nothing left in there
like i always say you can never have too
much seed
i'm not gonna shake it or kick it even
drink machines deserve respect
that won't help
hey it just ate my money stupid machine
one day people were a bell against the
machines what's wrong larry
oh nothing
ah there's my money back oh an extra
quarter even came out
you have to put coins in there it costs
a dollar
i guess i'll just put my coins in
so let's see
that must have been the galactic
festival
those are glow sticks i know i saw some
of those somewhere else
looks like someone had fun smelly old
clothes
i hate sleeping in tents
i don't see anything here that can
provide lead to faith
i don't see anything here that can
provide a lead to faith
i hate sleeping in tents
i don't know what kind of animal that
was but it must have been pretty big
the island looks kind of spooky that's
gofuku island
now that's a thick jungle
that must have been the galactic
festival
i wonder if the ring meets underwater
those birds can go to hell for all i
care
there's no way anyone's going to get
that ship seaworthy again
there's a lifeguard
i don't think this is a good place to go
for a swim
a lifeguard station a lifeguard station
i'd like to see the woman ah or the man
who wore that
now about faith's whereabouts do you
know what happened to her now
yeah i think i can piece it together
okay then let's see
can we be sure faith was here on kahlua
she had a room in the hotel if you had a
room in a hotel
how can we prove it
bobby saw her well we can chalk that one
up she was obviously here in the hotel
but where did she spend her time
she was probably at that galactic
festival you really think she was at the
galactic festival
can you prove it
there was a flyer in her hotel room she
knew about the festival
but that doesn't mean she was there
i have a feeling not me
all blonde women love festivals oh
you and your stereotypes
i don't know i give up
now it's frozen
um
um
wonderful a textbook kiki twister
let's not forget what's in there shall
we and you won't let anyone drink it
of course i won't let anybody drink it
but it's
becky no all right all right
so
so
i'm not going to eat that even if it
does mean bad weather
i'm not putting that anywhere near my
mouth
no appetite thanks
no disgusting
i'll take one
the buffet seems like a good nutrient
base for the seeds
that's growing like a weed real organic
fertilizer
that looks inviting but i think i'll
pass
i have a selfie suitable cocktail for
you so
cool wait just one minute buster
i'm not taking any more drinks from you
the bartender mixed it
okay that's all right then but uh
you better not drink too much of it it's
just for some fresh selfies
i can even suck on a straw without
swallowing i'm warning you
what now i can give one more point on
gulp
the pool water's now clean sweet
now i can finally get my bikini out and
dive in
maybe uh you shouldn't duck your head
under the water
never think of my hairstyle the only
thing i let touch my bun
is olive oil that was cold pressed by
andean dwarf goats i'll give them an
extra point on gulp
for that
the buffet is now completely vegan yay
about time i almost starve to death
you should eat small portions well duh
because of my intermittent fasting i'm
also doing a trigger warning for my
followers from the plants our living
beings community they always get so
cutely indignant when i take a picture
of myself in a meadow
okay that's one more point on gulp
i have to go influence somewhere else
now
have you seen a pretty blonde anywhere
no well
apart from myself don't you think that
would apply to me too
absolutely
i know those glow lights are from the
festival were you there
i saw a whole box of them there exactly
so you were there yes everyone had to
wear them
nobody thought of getting lamps it can
get pretty dark at night you know
and how was the festival awful it wasn't
galactic in the slightest
i wasn't able to find myself there at
all and almost died of thirst instead
and no one gave me any money to continue
my trip
there were probably a lot of other hot
women bikinis at the festival right
no there were only some pretty strange
people there were these
totally disgusting guys who tried to hit
on me they were telling me about
something called
sleaze wars no idea what the hell that's
all about
there must have been a blonde at the
festival tall
slender probably wearing a purple dress
probably seemed a little confused
i'm pretty sure she had to have been
there think hard
yes there was someone she was stumbling
around like she didn't know how she got
there
you remember where she went after the
festival i remember seeing her walking
towards crescent cove
i never saw her after that it must have
been fape
she was in crescent cove
so
so let's see
quite an achievement hitting this
particular little island
i wonder if the ring meets underwater
who would have thought it that's water
a crescent moon shaped bay
somebody's been collecting garbage here
with a vengeance too
i've seen that logo on those garbage
bags somewhere before
i don't see anything here that would
point to faith having been here i don't
think
faith was sunbathing here as nice as
that thought might be
now about fates whereabouts do you know
what happened to her now
no i need more details
so
hey hey did you have anything to do with
this
do i look like the kind of guy who'd be
into greasy birds
to be perfectly honest yes you do
how's the bird doing it's covered in oil
it's covered in oil
you can get it out if you wash it at 90
degrees
have you by any chance seen a pretty
blonde anywhere
i try to avoid people as much as
possible i try to avoid people as much
as possible
her name is faith ring any bells no
i saw you collecting garbage in crescent
cove
yeah and not just a bit either it's
considered a particularly romantic spot
you wouldn't believe the disgusting
things i have to clean up there
yuck
you mean you can spend a romantic night
for two there
yes you can but i always end up cleaning
up the trash on my own
maybe you just don't have the right
company you're more than welcome to help
me
that is not what i meant then i'm not
interested
i saw you collecting garbage yeah it's
considerable
i'm sure there must have been a woman
there i didn't see anyone
did you find anything unusual in
crescent cove
well there is this
this is the puck that knocked faith out
what oh
never mind she must have had it on her
and then lost it
where did you find it by the lifeguard
station
so let's see
there's a lifeguard it's plain to see
that someone walked from the bay into
the jungle
small dainty feet i can see that and
there's an imprint of a round object
hmm there's something familiar about it
no there's nothing else of interest
there
there's a clearing in the jungle
this tarp definitely came from the hotel
that's
extremely suspicious i should ask bobby
about it
a paddle in the middle of the jungle no
there's no sign of faith here nope
there's no sign of faith here
now about faith's whereabouts do you
know what happened to her now
no i need more details
hey bobby what's up larry
the hotel now has its well-deserved
five-star rating on gulp that wasn't so
hard
excellent i have to admit larry you're
someone i can really count on
and uh not just horizontally huh
speaking of which
not now i have to rework the marketing
plan this rating opens up a boatload of
new opportunities
but as far as the fine is concerned you
can consider it paid
thank god to be perfectly honest yes
i just made up that whole fine thing
what why would you do that
did you use me so tell me
when exactly did you feel used during
the sex
but okay let's call it a draw
i saw a tarp from the hotel in the
jungle so
what is that place none of your business
and it has nothing to do with your faith
so uh how about it huh
ready for a little more larry loving not
now
i just ate but don't go too far away i'm
pretty spontaneous
as far as that's concerned you know i
noticed that
i saw a tarp from the hotel in the
jungle so
what is that place none of your business
and it has nothing to do with your faith
i have to be going
yes evidence is growing that this larry
is a top
us agent why he must have undergone
intensive chemical warfare training
he was able to mix complex chemicals to
achieve the desired result he could
probably make a bomb of enormous
explosive power from ingredients found
in every kitchen
in north korea he would be a much
sought-after man and not just there
am i yes pull yourself together
your target is faith don't lose sight of
that
we have to find that secret algorithm of
course by the way
do you still have any old contacts that
could supply me with armored cars and
flame throwers
i can't think of anyone han why
apparently there are some who are not so
happy with my new
management style some of them want to go
to
extremes and form a labor council the
scum
i hate this city and my once i'm done
with
prune i'm going to be so happy to return
home
find faith's algorithm
so
so let's see
not interesting not interesting
the ship sank there who would have
thought it
that's water
look those are some kind of ruins
there's a clearing in the jungle
no no no
no this tarp that's extreme
now about do you know what happened to
her now
yeah i think i can piece it together
okay then let's see
we know for certain that faith was at
the hotel
and we believe she attended the galactic
festival
do we have any leads
shawn he saw her there true she did tell
us that
we can believe shaunie when she says
that she saw faith
but what happened after the festival
faith went the crescent cold after the
festival you mean the bay you can see
from the hotel but can you prove faith
was in crescent cove
emma found the puck that knocked faith
out you're right
that puck could have only come from her
so
faith went to the festival then to
crescent cove
then to the lifeguard station but where
did she go
after that
into the jungle at least it's right next
to the lifeguard station
we followed faith's trail to the
lifeguard station and believed that she
then
went into the jungle do we have any
evidence
there was a print of the puck by the
lifeguard station and footprints
led into the jungle you're right those
are all definite clues
and the sequence of events seems to be
logical we know where she was but
we still don't know where she is it's a
big jungle
but there's one person who doesn't miss
a single thing that happens on this
island
the seashell on the beach no dummy
bobby the governor of the island but she
would have told me if she knew where
faith was
are you sure you want to put the squeeze
on her like
examiner like sherlock holmes
was it his name john oh just never mind
hey bobby what's up larry
i now know that faith was in the jungle
with my help
she had a room and went to the festival
crescent bay
the jungle and then her trail disappears
however i did find a tarp from the hotel
there
there's more to it than that what was
faith
doing there larry i
i think you're overthinking this you
know
we could always do something else
again there are still a few things i'd
like to try
fine time to get it on
wait oh i really need to find out what
happened to faith
so you're just gonna have to be patient
baby i really have to find out what
happened to faith
why are you so persistent about this
faith you're here on a tropical island
island and there's a gentle breeze
outside we can just drop
all our clothes isn't that enough why do
you keep thinking about this faith
it's hard to explain but i have to find
her i have to make sure she's all right
okay i don't know where your faith is
but
i had a boat in the jungle for
emergencies i mentioned that to her once
and now it's gone what more can you tell
me about the boat
i never used it it's blue
so let's see
there's a blue boat lying there so it's
at the beach of muffington island
okay we're one step closer to finding
faith let's recap
faith went into the jungle
where she took a boat that bobby had
hidden in the jungle
do we really know that anybody could
have taken it but
faith knew about it so let's assume that
it's true
it's just where did she take the boat
to muffington island that's right we saw
a blue boat there
it must be bobby's good work larry i
calculate a 92.3 percent probability
that
faith is now on muffington island then
we should get there as soon as possible
headquarters yeah not
you yes it looks like this larry guy has
located face
excellent where exactly on a neighboring
island
then you can take him out now all i care
about is faith and her algorithm
i'll wait a little longer apparently he
saw her there but i don't have
confirmation yet
when the time is right i will grab him
and use my dreaded interrogation
techniques
nobody has ever resisted them do that
do you have any interrogation techniques
that involve
wearing a latex costume the kind with a
zippy in there
i don't need one washable i'm sure to be
easy for you to get blood off too
anyway they're really resistant to other
fluids oh that's for sure
i'll remember that yanmai out
oh you can't always choose your
customers
hi can we go so everything should be
taken care of now
we are good to go although what now
i don't know how to navigate we'd be
lost at sea the waters here are
relatively
uncharted and i have no navigational
data for this region
maybe we should ask around the hotel see
if anyone there can help us
on my way
do you have any kind of map of the
archipelago we haven't had one of those
for a long time
bummer i have to figure out some other
way to navigate the islands
oh oh we have a tourist app developed in
collaboration with unter for that
i could install it on your pi phone for
you if you want that would be great
i don't want those fingers touching me
it's all wireless that's better
i'm ready to receive
did it work app installed cool
hey man seeing as you're here some woman
left a message for you
really she's waiting for you up in her
room great but
who she said her name was faith what
faith is here i knew it don't you think
it's weird that she suddenly just shows
up
now doesn't matter as long as she's here
i'm going to her room right now
why hey is the lamp broken
no but i've been waiting for you larry i
love these kinds of surprises this has
gotta be the best night of my life
put on these handcuffs laughter sure
thing baby
wait a minute somehow you sound
different
faith don't play dumb i'm not playing
dumb it's just the way i
am i guess i'll just be going now
so you like bondage this is not a game
laugher
okay of course not mistress
you will whimper before me but of course
you obviously know no fear of course i
could be afraid if that's what you're
into
but i somehow have the feeling that
you've been
stalking me it's perfectly normal that
you feel attracted
to me just exactly how frightened do you
want me to be
something like this oh
i'm so afraid quiet what country do you
work for
well i used to program video games you
mean you
play with other people if they play long
why not or how do you mean that i have
been
watching you i know your abilities and
now
i will find out your secrets then just
ask should i keep being afraid
quiet where is fate
oh you know each other i know she was
the boss of prune
and that someone is very interested in
her that's pretty understandable
you're throwing smoke again i have
acquired torture certifications
in five countries i took first place in
the ear shredding competition more than
once
and no one has ever survived my secret
weapon
so what is your secret weapon my dreaded
wait
i'm not telling you that too bad you're
making me so confused which group do you
belong to
i wonder how lem is doing these days
don't play
dumb i've already exposed your cover
agent
lover i have never experienced such
resilience
he should be trembling in fear what did
you do with faith spy phone
it was beyond salvation he destroyed it
in cold blood why aren't you carrying a
weapon
give me a good skin search and you'll
find my weapon
stop i'm going to get out the fondue
forks in a minute i
love fondue quiet i have to think pie do
you have any idea what this is all about
yes but as usual you wouldn't understand
he shows absolutely no signs of fear
he would probably survive any kind of
torture
he totally confuses me could you speak a
little louder i can hardly hear you
enough is enough larry laffer why aren't
you afraid you are tied to a bed
and in an utterly hopeless situation
well you
could untie me and we could have a lot
of fun together i just can't believe it
you don't even know the meaning of fear
i like that in a man
don't think i didn't know she checked me
out all the time i thought my cover was
perfect on all my missions never have i
met such a perfect agent
what is your secret i'll have to get
very close to you to find
out there's plenty of room on the bed
baby that was
acceptable what a man of mystery you are
larry
oh not at all you are much more
mysterious yanmai
i only have one secret larry and
between my training and the new gene
therapy i am not
only a deadly weapon but almost immortal
there is only one thing that can kill me
an uzi no a kgb helicopter
that's what my shaman in north korea
foretold that's why i hunted down and
destroyed every kgb helicopter in the
world
that's a very strange piece of
information but my
instincts tell me i should remember that
larry
are you done now didn't you have other
plans so i
think i have some business to a tattoo
well i'll see each other later i guess
we will
damn did i really tell him my secret
larry yes do you plan on sleeping with
every woman you come across
hey this is a whole new experience for
me normally nothing like this
ever happens to me it might be time for
you to start learning to pull yourself
together but i have my first stalker
not everyone can say that even if she's
a little strange
she is strange
pie can we go we can navigate now i
don't see why not all common sense aside
common sense is totally overrated
finally i have my raft back
now i can find out if faith is still
alive
but do i have anything to help me pass
the just get aboard and set
sail damn it alright alright
headquarters yes did you torture larry
how many toes does he have left
send me a couple i forgot to put my toe
collection back in the freezer a while
back then i had to throw them all away
when i have toes so much even when
they're still attached
two feet
i haven't found out much
yet he's on his way to the neighboring
islands now and i'll see what he finds
there
why is he still alive there's something
about him
we need to find out more start a
background check in new lost wages
he must have been there and left a trail
all right
i'll take care of it and um i
may have told him a little too much
about myself
what does he have better interrogation
techniques than you do
maybe i should hire him to find faith no
i have everything under control i want
to see some results and toes
hmm let me put it this way it's
inhabited at least
be careful that really doesn't look very
inviting come on
what could happen to us here
i think it looks pretty cozy i have a
really bad feeling here
oh hello i'm larry hmm larry lapper
it's uh a man grab him hey not so fast
ow pie
do something i'm in your pocket damn it
what the hell am i supposed to do
they've taken larry to a hut what kind
of women are those
they look dangerous i'd better stay
hidden
you're a little rough well not that i'm
complaining
but it all depends on the situation even
more so in the 21st century
than it used to be the sensitivity
training is finally having an impact
damn quiet i have to think
hi i'm larry larry laffer your name is
of no
importance be happy your death will not
be in vain
it will be of great benefit to us man
huh
faith you're alive faith
that's what that glowing box called me
too maybe that
used to be my name but that's my past
but faith don't call me that here i am
known as
the queen
of course you're a queen faith it's a
good thing that you're submissive to me
what is this place this is our island
no man has ever set foot on it well
no man has ever left it our tribe lives
here
secluded from the rest of the world we
live the way we want to live
admittedly the organization could still
do with some work but i'm on it
i also see room for improvement as far
as monitoring the bay is concerned me
that was a misunderstanding on that
thingy that
thingy is a scrum board and it can only
help if we
all use it can't we just talk it over
me we we have to keep up with the times
we can be much more efficient with a
modern organizational structure
so cancel my appointments for today i
have to deal with the intruder
you have no appointments my queen
how did you end up here i've always been
here
no you weren't no you weren't you're
faithless
the boss a former boss of prune
incorporated
and the future mrs laffer you can even
have one of those modern double names
faith laughter less hmm although now
that i've heard
it quiet i am the queen here
you will obey me it doesn't matter how i
got here
i'm here now and so are you
but not for long faith can't you
remember anything at all
not even me i've never seen you before
in my life
worm i've never made such a bad
impression on a woman in my life
how come there are only women on this
island because we don't want to have any
men here
except on our plates wait a minute just
to make sure there's no misunderstanding
by plates you mean we eat men
okay then i understood it
correctly but why a holy book
commands it i saw a tattered book out
there
is that the one you mean it contains all
our tribal rules
it's been here longer than i have the
tribe's entire society is built on the
rules found within it
and that book tells us how to deal with
men
let's go back to new lost wages where
new lost wages
your former life everything could be the
way it was before
you can even say prune there's only one
place i want to be
here on this island together with my
sisters
let's go back to new lost wages enough
lock him in the back
there's no meat on him yet we'll have to
fatten him up
and when he's fat enough time for a
feast
but faith you must remember prune
timber the explosion on can come i
thought i had lost you
i even lit a candle for you i thought i
would be forever without you
i
enough take him away
headquarters yes i've located faith so
she's alive when will you be back with
her i haven't been able to capture her
yet
and there's another problem well
it would seem faith has lost her memory
what
how can that be i don't know but she now
believes she's the queen of a tribe of
female
cannibals huh oh just wait i thought i
told you not to eat the lube oh so where
were we
queen of a tribe of female cannibals
exactly
she doesn't know who she is so that
means she doesn't know where her
algorithm is either
so it would be pointless to bring her
here they even managed to overpower that
super agent larry how do you want to
proceed
i'll keep observing i suspect that larry
has already come up with some
ingenious plan to escape and bring
faith's memory back
hey get down from there that's a sex
swing
no swinging without sex oh on second
thought
stay on it i'll be done in a minute baby
right yan mai
continue your surveillance surveillance
is good i have to go
oh someday i'm going to quit my job as a
freelance deadly secret agent
and look for something quieter
damn the cannibal girls confiscated some
of my stuff
at least they didn't find everything
hi yes larry the prison in new lost
wages was cozier than this
is that the only thing you're worried
about of course not
it would have made me wonder too if you
weren't thinking about why
am i gonna have to eat man meat now too
uh that is actually an astonishingly
good question larry but
what do you want to do about faith it's
easy we break out of here get her memory
back and then she and i finally have
wild sex
what's this
white clothes gold necklace sir
could you by chance be a pervert my name
is swingle sir
i think i am the same as you sir a
pervert
oh boy this island just keeps getting
worse
and worse
i'm not a pervert i just have
extraordinary tastes
but of course sir that's what i always
say when i get arrested
is that a diving suit oh yes it's
perfect for diving
in all kinds of liquids totally washable
sir
how'd you end up here well i came to
kahlua because i heard there was a place
here where
even the most extraordinary desires can
be satisfied
they call it the cavern of cosmic
cognition
i like caves sir that definitely sounds
interesting
unfortunately the cavern's location is a
mystery
a myth of the archipelago supposedly
one gains a deeper knowledge of oneself
when one enters the cave
and what else could that mean but
multiple orgasms
you find the ultimate pleasure did you
find it
no but that's alright even if you do
find the cave
you can't just enter it because you need
a keystone
seafarers scattered the pieces to the
four winds
here in the archipelago centuries ago
did you hear that larry
that could be interesting what i kind of
quit paying attention after the bit
about extraordinary desires
then i prefer to explore what pleasures
kahlua
and the other islands have to offer me
and ended up here
the ladies talk about feeding me up so
that i can provide a festive meal
hey just like me
what's the deal with these cannibals i
don't know sir they do seem to be very
committed young ladies when i look at
the interior decor
then they obviously didn't come on a
ship
no need to call me sir i'm larry master
larry
it is a pleasure to meet you even if the
circumstances
could be more refreshing you really can
just call me larry
oh sir i would never even consider such
a thing
not even if things had become more
intimate between us
okay this is oh
very strange now you find it strange
not everything else that has happened so
far are you saying that you don't find a
tribe of lesbian cannibals normal
i think you need sensitivity training it
would be better if you started looking
for a way to get us out of here
damn the cannibal girls confiscated some
of my stuff
at least they didn't find everything
i'm taking this with me at the risk of
someone thinking i'm a doctor
i wonder what would happen if i pulled
on it
ah so that's what happens
i wonder what that's for
the third arm never hurts
unfortunately it won't open the cattle
guards are talking outside but
i can't hear what they're saying this
way
i could use that to hear stuff
there are two of those cannibal girls on
guard duty out there
but it's just a face i think all of us
go through it it'll pass
but i'm just curious what is it about
men that you're so
interested in they're useless i've never
seen one
naked his you know yes you have i mean
not all charred and wrinkled you'd be
better off focusing on your job
otherwise the queen's gonna be so angry
again yeah you're right
and don't forget to update the scrum
board after your shift
i won't see you later
hmm interesting
locked
it fits perfectly
it's too far away my arm's too short
when my arm's not long enough there's
nothing better than an extension
do you have any idea how we can get out
of here but master larry
why would i want to leave
because they locked us up but master
larry what's wrong with a pair of
handcuffs
oh god what is it master larry
good heavens you've gone so pale all of
a sudden
you you yes yes you're even worse than i
am oh thank you so much master
but seriously how can we escape well
we can't but that's not bad it's just
about time for another meal
maybe we should go on a hunger strike
but that won't fill us up
okay i'll take care of it myself i got
in here so
i can get back out too that's what i
always tell myself during sex
ah
what was that about the cave and the
keystones again one of the local legends
my dear sir
a cave is said to impart profound
knowledge to all those who pass through
it ecstasy sir
ecstasy but unfortunately it's not all
that easy to get to the cave anymore
and you also need a lost keystone to
open it
i don't think faith remembers anything
what should she remember master larry
well me her former life oh
god so boring
see you later
let's give it a try
i can't reach it maybe swingle could do
something
hey i need your help i'm sorry sir but i
can't reach your pants right now
that's not what i mean can you reach
that cable
oh master larry electrical shocks
are wicked and here at first i thought
you were boring
should i attach the ends of the cable to
my nipples
all you have to do is hold it fine then
see you later
hello can you come in here please
what do you want
what are you two talking about out there
did you eavesdrop on us
no i wasn't sure what you were saying
that's why i was asking
that's none of your business you're our
prisoner and i'm not even supposed to
talk to you
can i get something to eat you'll get
your food when i decide it's time
but i'm hungry now it's mine to decide
bummer and here i am always bringing
someone something to eat
uh what's it like being a cannibal what
do you want to know
what do you ladies do all day the queen
told us not to talk to strangers about
that
but to be honest it's exhausting ever
since the queen organized us we've
constantly had to do sprints
i hate sprinting too everything has to
be agile
you girls look pretty limber to me no
i'm talking about scrum
scum no it's the way we work let's talk
about something else
i always get so tired when people talk
about work
get a job if you're a man you wouldn't
be able to handle the job anyway
what does guard duty entail you guard
things
you have to patrol and inspect things
regularly
maybe you should do a cell inspection
why i could be planning an escape
you no one's ever broken out of this
cell
the little guy is in bad shape that's
nothing new he's
totally sick in every way imaginable he
tells me about how great the sex is when
you have an
out-of-body experience i mean how is
that even possible
i don't want to find out
i'm bored me too
can you bring us a board game what is a
board game you have a board in which you
move pieces around
don't you have any of those here can you
eat the pieces no
then we don't have them
let me out or my god will send a storm
to destroy the island
god would never do that she gave us this
island an island where we can just be
ourselves where men
still have their place i really don't
want to know where that is
i heard that you'd like to see a
non-barbecued man naked
well we don't get a lot of that around
here and when we do
it's never for long we could change that
tell me are you a typical man
you mean my tastes or my looks your body
i still have all my parts
if that's what you mean okay
show me you sure don't waste any time my
shift's almost over
do it
okay at least it's not charred but it's
still
all wrinkled
he's off duty now does he have to write
everything down on a scrum board too
fortunately not you have to touch it
you should see what happens then oh
good grief
you stay out of this well it's not
entirely wrong
but now i've seen an original thanks
always happy to help
especially when you don't get sued
reminds me of your food
now i really want some food well it's
not feeding time yet
but since you showed me yours now i'll
show you mine really
hold on a second
that does look very um appetizing
at least a lot more appetizing than the
other one
no matter what we do with that little
guy he just doesn't gain weight
or maybe it just takes longer my bodily
fluids are
always in full flow my good woman
ugh
if i touch that i might be able to
bypass the cable
but my hands would be toast
it fits perfectly
let's give it a try
we did it pie let's go we can finally
escape this island
are you just going to leave the little
guy behind
we'll do whatever we can to save him
that's the larry i know
leaving so soon master larry i would
have thought you would have appreciated
the company of these lovely ladies
and here i was hoping that we would get
to know each other much better
much more intimately but
now that i think about it we can leave
him here
if you're resourceful enough to break
out of this very well-guarded prison
with your help i might even be able to
locate that
cavern of cosmic cognition we could
experience the pleasures there
together wouldn't that be wonderful
i'm not so sure well if you want to
learn more
check out my hotel room number 69
where you can find a file i compiled it
contains
everything i found out about it
i don't think about it keep a stiff
upper lip that
too
we got away and nobody has to eat anyone
swingle is still there oh he'll take
care of himself
but what do we do now faith has lost her
memory
she can't even remember me now think
about how we can change that larry
hmm think sharp larry think
sharp i
hit her on the head with a rubber
chicken why would you do that
somebody once told me that you always do
something with a rubber
chicken when you don't know what else to
do you should try looking for better
company
you just learned something from swingle
his zippers distracted me
the thing about the cave what cave larry
he said that there is a cavern of cosmic
cognition on the archipelago
whoever enters it gains a deeper
knowledge of themselves
i've known everything there is to know
about myself for a long time
not you faith oh right
whether that has anything to do with the
pleasures that little perv is looking
for
remains to be seen but maybe this cave
does contain some powers that can help
faith learn about herself
and maybe then she'll remember sometimes
i feel like you do all my thinking for
me
and i like that so now you have to
locate the cave
and open it yes and then find a way to
get
faith there yes and then i know i
put a rubber chicken on her head oh no
larry if the legend is true she'll
remember
everything it all sounds almost too
simple okay let's get back to kalua
we should look for that file in swingle
suite
headquarters come in please
no i said that's lube it doesn't go in
your mouth
it goes ah stick that back out y'all
what's up baby have you found out
anything about this lottie guy yet
hold on hi get my he used to work for
prune
what we found him in the personnel
records
he was a stripper intern
unbelievable that must have been a cover
identity
so he already infiltrated prune where he
probably stole
all the company's secrets but on whose
behalf
who are you working for larry
he's clearly a threat maybe you should
eliminate him
just to be on the safe side no we can't
lose sight of our goal
faith if he managed to infiltrate prune
he might be able to figure out a way to
get faith her memory back
that's the only way we can find out
where the algorithm is
right you have my complete trust and
my best torture knife but wash it early
before you bring it back
it's a family heirloom understood
i should see how the secret project is
going hopefully
there have been some results
i'm under pressure all the way up to
here
sorry my darling my
favorite engineer my genius
how are the tests going well to be
honest
not as well as i hoped the motor skills
aren't fully developed yet
and the ai doesn't work well enough and
the sex routines
they belong to the motor skills
fortunately
our test subjects all signed
indemnification contracts
protecting us from any injury-based
lawsuits
faith's algorithm would make everything
so much simpler it can't be long now
nari
once we have the self-learning routine
it will run exactly the same way
by itself but we can't waste any time
we have to announce our product i don't
think that's advisable
yes it is nari something is brewing in
new lost wages
i feel it okay i feel energy in my watch
too
but that's got nothing to do with this
at any rate we have to be one step ahead
of everyone else soon we will reveal to
the world
the pie pot
so uh yeah this definitely looks like
swingle's room to me
he's certainly made himself comfortable
here don't you think sophie
please just find that file and let's get
out of here
discreet and versatile
strange nubs
why is it called a ball gag i mean it's
not even funny
i wouldn't fit into that hopefully
they don't look like they've been used
but i'll play it safe and keep my hands
off them
i like bieber's
i know i'm not supposed to pull levers
where i don't know what they do
bad
ah now i remember why i didn't want to
do that anymore
i like my leisure suit much better i'm
not touching that
pretty handy when you just take one of
these things off again
so
so
so
good idea
those two things won't work together
okay what should i dial
that unlocked the safe
yeah man
hello dr shu there's no one there
i'm curious to see what's in swingle's
file look at this
pie this must be the file swingle was
talking about
it's kind of sticky only touch it with
your fingertips
i don't want to even think about the
diseases you could catch from that
let me scan it for you instead i'll put
it all in my database so i can give you
the information
whenever you need it just don't hold me
too close
ew okay
there i got it all
what exactly is in the file swingle has
been very busy indeed
these are copies of historical documents
from the crew that discovered the
archipelago
diary entries and letters the captain's
logbook
some pretty confused notes and swingle
has also entered some notes of his own
the ship's crew actually entered this
cavern of cosmic cognition that swingle
mentioned to open it
they needed a keystone which they found
at that point
the records become a little muddled it
seems they learned a lot about
themselves
but for some of them it wasn't very nice
what they learned
led them to break the keystone into four
pieces captain muffington
rajabog cockburn lady gobbledick and the
marquis de carnard
they each kept one piece they concealed
the route to the cave so that no one
would ever enter it again
this sounds like a job for a larry
laffer what happened to them
they all died under mysterious
circumstances
tell me about the captain muffington
first settled on one of the islands
which to this day bears his name but
whatever he learned about himself in
that cave
one night he couldn't take it anymore he
tried to sail the
unsatisfied out of the archipelago with
a small crew
but huge waves smashed his ship against
the rocks
one of them was the legendary phallus
rock which is still worshipped today as
a symbol of fertility
so his part of the keystone probably
sank there with him probably
what do you know about cockburn regional
cockburn started a family with lady
gobble dick oh
that's interesting his daughter later
took the name
marley wait that's bobby's name too i
should ask her about that
so cockburn lived happily ever after he
died of a broken hip from sex addiction
just what i said oh what a life were you
listening to me you're making it sound
like sex addiction is a bad thing
i whatever anyway he was buried on
muffington island
probably with his keystone
what happened to lady gobble dick she
mysteriously suffocated
not much information is available about
her except that she lived with cockburn
here's another one of his diary entries
my beloved lady gobble dick's grave must
never be found by anyone
the dark truth must never be revealed
only i know the way to her grave
it begins on the entry ends there
it appears the second page is missing i
have to find that second page
to get to lady gobble dick's grave and
find out more about her keystone
what happened to the marquee the marquis
couldn't cope with what he learned about
himself in the cave he threw himself
into the kahlua volcano
oops hmm that means there's no trace of
his keystone and it may have melted
along with him
but you could go to the volcano and look
for clues okay
so i have four keystones to find and of
course to locate the cavern or cosmic
cognition itself
is there any information in that file
that points to where i can find it
a number of things point towards kofuku
island swingle has even entered some
coordinates where he believes the cave
might be
but even if you find the cave and all
four parts of the keystone
you still have a problem
i'm too sexy for my shirt no you have to
get faith to go with you
into that cave you mean i have to trick
the dangerous armed hannibal lesbians to
get an audience with their queen who has
amnesia and wants to roast me
exactly as good as done and larry
i don't know if this is even a good idea
what those people learned about
themselves in the cave back then
it drove some of them crazy who knows
what could happen to faith in that cave
or to you cosmic knowledge
self-knowledge
endless pleasures that cave could be
dangerous too
we have no choice pie faith is confused
and has memory loss
maybe the cave will give her mind a
nudge in the right direction
and if it somehow turns me into a sex
craved pervert at the same time
then nothing will have changed hey i was
going to say
then i'll just have to live with it
until you die of a broken hip or throw
yourself into a volcano
this is starting to make my head hurt
pie don't worry
i entered it all in your app
what a blowhard not right at the moment
more in general
so
and you look like you want to explore my
love cave again
then again you always look like that
so that's a yes that's a no
thanks but i'm satisfied for the moment
but i'm not
your problem
regiball cochran is your ancestor that's
true
how did you find out about that he
carries his brains in his pocket sister
yeah he does
regibold was not exactly the climax of
my family tree
the stone downstairs in the lobby was
his yeah
larry that must be one of the keystones
can i have the stone from the lobby it's
really pretty the only way i let it out
of my hands is if i were to get another
memento of regiable cockburn
like maybe his legendary signet ring
it's supposed to have some truly
extraordinary
powers
is there anything else you can tell me
about regal cockburn
there hasn't been that much written or
recorded about him he was deeply in love
with lady gobble dick and led an
uneventful life i once tried to promote
his alleged motto as a slogan for kahlua
but
the resonance wasn't there so i gave it
up what was it then
if it moves you can screw it nice motto
but a bad slogan exactly
where can i find the cavern of cosmic
cognition nobody knows for sure
according to legend somewhere on gofuku
island
i used to drag tourists there to show
them the remains of the advanced
civilization
the stoneheads they weren't particularly
impressed that's why i don't bother
anymore
but if there are traces of an advanced
civilization there
i call it advanced civilization because
that's all we have here
it looks to me like some people who
couldn't tolerate the native mushrooms
washed up here a long time ago and
built strange things and the founding
fathers weren't here of their own free
will either
but were shipwrecked here instead
somehow a lot of people have ended up in
this archipelago that way
there are still some of the guys who
came here for the festival near the cave
on gafuku i mean why not
as long as they don't break anything
from a purely commercial standpoint that
makes sense
that's what i said of course i make sure
not too many people disappear
nobody here wants any news of that to
get out nobody
i i i get it already
did you know that there are female
cannibals here
of course and that doesn't frighten you
of course i
i mean i make sure that they don't
abduct any guests who are particularly
well off but
say if someone is clearly way behind on
their payments
but aren't tight wads usually tough i'm
not eating them myself
well you certainly made a meal out of me
of course i make sure not too many
people disappear
nobody here wants any news of that to
get out nobody
i i i get it already
is the volcano still active it's
actually quite active
that's why nobody goes there of course
there are always a few crazy adventurers
who see that as a tough
challenge but then that's the lava's
problem not mine
where's there an island around here with
a particularly dangerous reef
if i tell you that will you feel
impelled to go there
maybe with your so-called raft then it's
better i don't tell you or i'll have you
on my conscience
i'm leaving now but and maybe another
woman will want to have sex with me if
she doesn't have anything better to do
how's the water wet you stupid or what
stick your hand in if you want to know
for sure i didn't mean to
don't care what you meant
have you been here at the hotel long are
you implying that i've been
here since the 80s no of course not i
have though
my second husband ripped off this stupid
investor
and took him for a cheap suite and then
i ripped him off
now the sweet is mine
you sound pretty determined you could
call it that maybe you do have some
brains
kid and now you're living the good life
here nah i'm looking for a new husband
let's hope number eight is better than
number seven and
is packing more in his pants than number
six how about you
kid you already spoken for
and how oh well you're not my type
anyway
why not too thin too young
too pale no i thought it was because i
don't have any money
then our marriage would have been very
short
how's the husband hunt going kinda
stalled
had a candidate in mind then he went
swimming one night
and disappeared well one of his feet
washed up on the beach
don't want to marry a foot
nice drink straight alcohol
only way i can tolerate this meaningless
existence
you mean the whole leisurely floating in
a pool under the tropical sun thing
here's mud in your eye kid
can i have that crocodile it brings back
fond memories of my third husband
although actually he was an too
take it
i have to get going don't drown
i always wanted to have an inflatable
crocodile in my pants
and i'll just grab this energy drink
hey shawnee
how's the bagpacking going it's pretty
hard when there aren't many people
around
because they don't give you enough money
sort of even the guy in the lobby won't
give me any of his tips
that could be because he works for them
he just stands around all the time not
working
besides he probably is just using them
for drugs true enough i guess
do you have any tips on how i can bake
pack too oh you're doing all right with
that raggedy outfit of yours
i beg your pardon this is a
wedding suit your expression's good too
just a little confused
hungry and pleading hey i always look
like this
then you should be able to manage a trip
around the world
who are these people who give you money
they're from all different walks of life
i just have to build an emotional
connection to them so that they
understand my spiritual journey
some people have real problems with that
they're just not in touch with
themselves
or are they stingy or that i came to
this archipelago to think one of my
benefactors
personally he founded this new totally
hip cryptocurrency
and opened a new headquarters with his
employees here on an island
cryptocurrency i'm sure you've heard of
it clickcoin
don't ask me exactly how that works i
haven't been able to use it to pay for
anything yet
but it's good to have a reserve in your
wallet wallet anyway they're
headquartered on an island that's
completely
inaccessible an island completely
surrounded by reefs
a lot of ships have gone down there some
of them are really old
they must have been wrecked centuries
ago larry according to sir muffington's
log
his ship the unsatisfied sank off a
storm tossed island here
we should take a closer look at that
island you're right about that
but shawnee why did they open their
headquarters in a place like this
for security reasons they said it's
private there it's unregulated offshore
waters and all that
what can you tell me about the island
with the dangerous reefs and the waves
like for example its name no idea
but the coordinates of the island are
minus 20
and three and your ship will have to be
especially well equipped to prevent it
from being wrecked too
all i have is a rat then even more so
you should put bumpers
on both ends of your raft otherwise the
waves will toss you around and smash you
against the rocks
that would be a bad thing wanna go with
me no
i'll let fate decide when the stars are
right the perfect wave will carry me
there
if that works i float through life like
a feather on the wind
what was that again about an island
surrounded by dangerous reefs the island
where my benefactor has his headquarters
its coordinates are -20 and three you
can't get there unless you have a ship
equipped with really good impact
protection otherwise you'll smash up on
the rocks there
and find a wet grave i've heard that's
supposed to be
unpleasant
see you later
okay folks it's time for a laugh
thank you you're a wonderful audience
just too bad you're not here except for
you
in the back what's your name larry larry
laugher you sure look like it too
it's one dynamite joke after another
today
today's the premiere of my new stage
show featuring exclusive new material
never before heard on any stage in the
world
wow an orc a troll and a mandalorian
walk into a bar
the mandalorian says i roll a seven
the orc drops dead in its tracks says
the mandalorian
hey i didn't shoot first
ah okay that one's kinda so so
hey i'm trying to work here what do you
want
your jokes are kind of odd i made them
all up myself
you did yeah well i mean sometimes i
take advice from my team
you have a team stop the interrogation
already
yeah i take what i can get actually i
copy it all from a joke book
and i don't even have that anymore i
lost i had it with me at that crazy
festival
maybe somebody there switched instead
now i got this book about
role-playing games but they're kind of
strange
i mean who wouldn't want to dress up as
a sexy nurse or something in a
role-playing game but
a mage a healer or
a dwarf well i guess i'll just have to
make the best of it
i find your jokes yes
totally it's experimental material
not everyone can keep up
can i have this book on role-playing
games the only thing i'd swap it for
would be a decent joke book
preferably the one i know if you can get
me that
you can have this dungeon master crap
do you ever get too old to be a comedian
honestly
i've been asking myself that for a while
now this rock style life in the
spotlight
it's pretty exhausting
i thought you were a comedian not a rock
star hey
that's disrespectful have you ever heard
your own jokes
true enough i guess
well i'll let you get back to clowning
around hey
comedy is a serious business
i already have one and that'll do
a necromancer pops up in front of a
busty blonde
she says is that a high character value
in your pants
or are you just happy to see me
oh
i feel a draft
the inflatable guy's valve fits right in
the hole
be gone with you
larry i pulled something else from
swingle's file for you and
the de carnard who tried to kill the
others from the unsatisfied
there's conflicting information either
he went crazy and tried to throw himself
into the volcano with the keystone or
cockburn tried to kill him there either
way the marquis disappeared with his
stones somewhere on or inside the
volcano
okay maybe we can find something
practical
no my mom always told me never to touch
molten lava
hello nice outfit who cares
what as long as there's nothing hanging
in the way try climbing when things are
dangling off you everywhere
finally a good reason for scanty
clothing i'm larry
larry laffer and i'm nora
do you climb professionally you could
say that i just turned my hobby into my
profession
mountain climber biologist what does
that have to do with climbing
how the hell else am i supposed to get
to the critters i'm investigating
some of them are really fast and agile
besides
i like the athletic challenge good for
the abs
unfortunately i often miss my grip and
fall
oh
what's your favorite animal cats what
just cats
i would have expected some totally
exotic animal i don't like to take work
home with me
good point
i'd like to get up to the top of that
volcano why would you want to go up
there
i'm looking for a stone from one of the
founding fathers which founding fathers
the ones who discovered this archipelago
rocks are boring
i'd love to help you get up there but i
can't do it without my climbing gear
there's supposed to be a dead marquee
here somewhere did you
see one no i'm only interested in pod
geckos
in what the archipelago is home to many
rare species
but one is truly unique and it can only
survive on the edges of a volcano
the long-tailed pod gecko if only i
could observe
one unfortunately some of my climbing
equipment is missing
my sister dora must have taken it by
mistake
where can i find your sister then oh i
have no idea where the hell she is now
she usually doesn't know herself she's
always totally overbooked she said
something about looking for a certain
plant
what was it called again something with
v
vamp strap ironer no that wasn't it
wait a minute i remember now vagina
dentata
i think i'll just bite my
it's tongue nice name for a plant i'm
not a plant person myself it's an orchid
that only grows in one place in the
archipelago it's extremely rare and has
been growing here for centuries
but like i said i don't know anything
about that stuff
larry there's a passage in swingles file
that mentions that plant
apparently the marquee was looking for
this plant because it's believed to have
sexual magical powers if the marquee was
there
maybe there's a clue to the keystone do
you know any more precisely where it is
the location is in the jungle on gofuku
island
and i have detailed directions on how to
get there we have to go to a very
specific clearing then let's get a move
on and when you get there
bring my climbing gear will you please
and give my love to dora
i have to run
oh
hey what's up do you have any idea what
happened to all that junk i collected
junk what junk the junk that was hanging
on that hook
the rough shape junk the junk-shaped
junk
i uh recycled it for you isn't that
great anything for the planet
so how's that bird doing now i had to
scrub it for hours to get the oil out of
his feathers
but i did it great news i set him free
in the jungle
even in a spot where there was a female
close by but as soon as he saw it
he panicked and ran in the opposite
direction that's weird
what a strange bird
another animal in distress somewhere not
at the moment
would you help me if the alarm went off
somewhere sorry i
have a lot of animals to take care of
myself that's definitely a good reason
once you're done at kahlua where will
you go from here
i don't know yet i go where i'm needed
there are still enough people in this
world who go through life
without thinking about others always
throwing things away tipping them over
breaking them stealing them sometimes
there's just no other way
i think you're pardoned nothing
see you later
the crocodile provides perfect
protection for one side of my raft
aesthetically this may not be the best
shock protection but
as long as it works it's already
perfectly built
uh
pie i know muffington's one of the
founding fathers but
why did they name the island after him i
think it was the only island that didn't
have a name
well that's something what else is here
the founding fathers spent a lot of time
here
and rigibald cockburn is said to be
buried here maybe you can find some
trace of him and i need to find a way to
talk to faith
she and the other cannibals will have to
trust me is there anything else you can
tell me about muffington island from the
file
the island is also considered to be
haunted
it's said to be haunted by some scary
sister superior
oh that sounds exciting maybe i can find
her
speaking of scary that guy back there
does look kind of menacing
larry swingle had also collected some
interesting information about this
island
i have to admit i am curious gofuku
island holds traces of a lost
civilization swingle suspected that this
cavern of cosmic cognition is located
here somewhere
good to know however this is also the
island with all the death traps left
behind by an
ancient civilization oh
that huge rock has to be moved out of
the way first
i can see something through the hole
i can see something through the hole
maybe you can even eat it and maybe
you'll start to glow from within
i wouldn't mind
but we can't get away from here i know
i feel the same way you do in case you
haven't noticed
we can't just play larp anyway and
how are we supposed to do that without a
game master
we just make it up ourselves have you
ever made anything up yourself uh
no but being a game master can't be that
hard
you also said making a computer game
wasn't hard hey nobody told me you need
an engine for that
and it was a publisher's fault anyway we
didn't
have one but they would have screwed
everything up
if we had found one whatever
we need a game master and game masters
don't just
fall from the heavens besides
can't even enter the ruins we can play
right here
no there's not enough atmosphere
you know what i've had enough yeah we're
out of here
hey what are you two doing here are you
selling pie phones in the jungle val
and did they make you wear those clothes
oh damn finley
is that weirdo from new lost wages don't
move
kyle maybe he won't notice us i'm
already talking to you
damn it didn't work
what are you doing here on the island we
came here for the galactic festival it
was supposed to be a one-of-a-kind event
galactic creatures lots of action and
music
they promised that nothing would be
impossible and
women yeah loads of stars were supposed
to be here
they weren't total flop no stars
we almost drowned and then there was the
storm
all a total waste but we found a few
like-minded people here and we thought
let's do a larp
i have no idea what a larp is a live
action role-playing game we slip into
the roles of characters
with whom we can identify or who are
completely different from ourselves
and then we immerse ourselves completely
in a world of fantasy for a while
it doesn't sound half bad but it all
depends on the quality of the game
master
they lead us through the fantasy world
and if they can't do that
unfortunately we don't have one at the
moment
how does that larp thing of yours work
we experience the wildest
adventures in a world of fantasy each of
us slips into a role
and the game master tells us what we
experience that's
it it's harder than it sounds a game
master has to know
exactly what they're doing otherwise it
gets really boring
hey i can be your game master who you
you don't look the type you have no idea
just how much imagination i really have
you just have to have enough for each of
us here of course
but we also want to play in a location
that's just
perfect for us what do you have in mind
oh we want to be heroes
and tackle deadly traps the more
dangerous
the better you know anywhere like that
i have to find the perfect location for
the lock first well
let us know when you find it
have you seen a book of bad jokes around
here anywhere joe
we took one of those from the festival a
role-playing book went missing there
it sucks can i have it sure we threw it
away
threw it away where somewhere out there
outside the cave
okay
how come there aren't any women in your
larp they're just not interested in that
sort of thing
none of them wanted us to save them but
we would have chained them up
so nicely they wouldn't even have had to
say anything
just sit there and look pretty like that
was too much to ask
now we have to leave it all to our
imaginations
oh i had to handle it that way myself
when i was young
i'm 29.
i have to get going
i can't operate it the way it is
something's missing
the stone disk fits on there perfectly
the stone disk fits on there perfectly
the stone disc fits on there perfectly
now it looks like all the discs are in
place
so
candles always come in handy
especially good with milk
how useful
hi i'm larry larry laffer and you look
like
a time traveler what what on earth gave
you that idea
i'm a janitor and that would have been
my next guess
i'm will comply um interesting name you
have there
you can thank my parents for that what
were their names reese and eve
so what do you do as a janitor uh you
know cleaning services
do you work at a school or something no
way
i'm a freelance janitor if the dirt gets
bad and you just don't know
who you're gonna call you
you know it will comply get everything
clean
i can yell at school children tenants or
employers too if that's what the client
wants
costs extra though
how'd you end up here i was looking for
a new professional challenge
so this galactic festival came along at
the perfect time
so i thought hey why not apply in the
corresponding costume so i made this one
myself
got the job and well i'm sure you saw
how that turned out
now i don't know how to get back to new
lost wages and somehow i ended up with
these guys
they told me that they needed more
players for their larp
i've never done anything like that
before but
i'm flexible and in this larp you are
what an intergalactic janitor of course
isn't that a little unimaginative isn't
a larp about slipping into completely
different roles
but why should i completely abandon my
innate abilities
besides a mop is a weapon not to be
underestimated it's kind of like the
swiss army knife of cleaning equipment
i have been to a lot of places but it
wasn't until i arrived on this island
that i truly understood the word
special what don't listen to her she has
a problem with men like us who have
extraordinary gifts
as game master i can offer you a great
story really
can i clean up in there too really the
best would be if it takes place in a
filthy dump where i have to make a
heroic effort to clean up is there
anywhere like that around here
i have to find the perfect location for
the larp first
good then let me know
over and out
so
ah here's the path the marquee described
maybe those guys threw the joke book in
here
that must be lewis's joke book
hey would you be dora who wants to know
i do
i mean who are you larry larry laffer
and how does that help me i don't know
you asked i give up
don't worry you get used to him
your sister says to say hi uh thanks
did she fall off something again no but
she's preparing to climb the volcano
i sure hope that doesn't turn into a
train wreck
have you seen a gold stone or a dead
marquee lying around here anywhere
no i probably would have noticed both of
those things
too bad what are you doing here
actually i came here to examine the
ruins they're one of my specialities
i more or less fell into it into the job
no i was on vacation in south america
when i got separated from my group and
fell into a pit landed right on top of
this gold statue
man it hurt then i was constantly on tv
and everyone said i was an explorer
specialized in some sort of tombs and
since i had nothing better to do
i thought i'd just travel around and see
if i could find some more
and luck not so far but that statue made
me rich so it doesn't matter
wow good for you i'm concentrating on
plants now they don't hurt as much when
you fall on them
looks like falling seems to run in your
family
i'm supposed to bring nora her climbing
equipment yeah i must have taken it by
mistake
i'm such a mess sometimes i'll take it
back to her once the orchid is bloomed
is that the vagina dentata maybe i can
help you get it to blossom
oh you've heard of it yeah
it is don't you dare touch it it's very
sensitive and only the most
empathetic and sensitive people should
approach it otherwise it will never
bloom and if it does
i want to be there to see it happen
i'm totally empathic i'm not so sure
about that yet
maybe i can help you to get that orchid
to bloom that would be a magical moment
but only absolute experts should be
present for that like me
and you don't look the type but i know a
lot about flowers
and bees oh yeah
okay then there are many different
orchids in the archipelago
but they are all extremely poisonous
except for one species
you can bring me one of those can't you
um
of course i'm sure you also know that
all the others are deadly
just the slightest skin contact will
kill you
where exactly does it grow again if you
know so much about orchids i'm sure
you'll have no trouble finding one
which flower do you want me to bring you
again a specimen of the only orchid on
the island that is not poisonous
how's your relationship with your sister
we actually get along quite well
although there is a bit of rivalry
after all we work in similar fields i
think she could be a little more relaxed
she's always looking for the next big
challenge she should stop and smell the
flowers along the way
like you exactly
see you later
an information brochure about the island
here are some boring facts about the
archipelago's history
lots of nice photos that seem to be
pretty old and some information about
the flora here
a rare highly bioluminescent fungus
which greatly reduces the heart rate
when you eat it
grows somewhere here in the archipelago
it seems the orchids here are all pretty
poisonous
only one species with a single blue
flower and pointed leaves
doesn't kill you the moment you touch it
i don't even want to know what kind of
dangerous animals they have here
oh
aah
hmm
an information here's some lots of nice
photos that seem to be rare
highly by it seems the orchids here are
all pretty poisonous
only one species with a single blue
flower and pointed leaves
doesn't kill you the moment you touch it
i don't even
that must be the non-toxic orchid the
dora wants
are you sure only one way to find out
you know i i think i'm still alive
good thing
foreign hey
i brought you the only non-toxic orchid
in the archipelago
oh wow that's it maybe i misjudged you
you do have some botanical expertise has
there been any change in the giant
orchid
no nothing at all i'm not sure
something's still
missing larry i've been going over the
marquis notes from swingle's file
and he wrote in his diary i have
discovered a most
unusual plant its scent is bewitching
and its appearance is alluring but the
orchid
is a harsh mistress it requires a great
deal of attention
three things are needed to make it
blossom it can only grow
if it is fertilized with poisonous bog
water like a fair lady
the orchid must be beguiled with words
the ethereal sound of classical music
touches not only the hearts of men but
also that of this plant
how does your python know all this i
taught it well did not
so uh plenty to do
ah hi i'm larry hi my name is otis
you seem pretty brave why i mean you're
a man
right you bet i am i should be throwing
you in our jail right now
no need i've been there what uh there's
nothing
well i'll make an exception
you like being in this tribe oh so so
yeah i'm not allowed to live in the
village my hut has to be outside
why is that somehow i sometimes feel
like i'm
different you know from the other
cannibal girls and i've been a member of
the tribe since the very beginning
and well i think you're how can i put
this delicately
you're clearly a man what of course not
that's an unsubstantiated allegation at
any rate
well i'm just so confused i don't really
know what i am
it's all so confusing
you have to learn to accept yourself as
you are what do you mean
you have to accept your masculine
attributes
i have the same problem myself but at
some point i simply had to accept that
my masculine virility
has no limits a man can also have his
merits
but the others behave so strangely
towards me
this society simply has expectations of
me that i can't meet
if you find yourself attractive then
others will
too there is something in what you're
saying
what do you know about the little guy in
prison oh he kind of creeps me out
oh he looks at me funny and he licks his
lips and the place is he grabs himself
there's no way i could ever reach those
on my body the other day
he made me so furious that i grabbed him
and choked him but he actually liked it
i stopped and he was really disappointed
he said he almost had a sexual
out-of-body experience
hopefully he'll soon be fat enough to
eat and i won't have to hear his voice
anymore
can you tell me about the sister
superior the sister superior
better not talk about her she's always
somewhere nearby watching us if we do
anything she doesn't like
bad things happen why don't you do
something about her
if only it was that easy she especially
picks on me
i'm her nephew you are that's what she
calls me and she thinks that everyone in
her family is respectable
so i should be too
you have to learn to accept yourself as
you are what do you mean
i'll teach you my best tricks for
getting women so tell me
well it can't be summed up in one
sentence
i have time well to be honest i'd have
to teach a whole seminar
then at least tell me your best trick
maybe we should change the subject
before he realizes that this isn't
really your area of expertise
do you like being in oh
how can i put
i'll bet you got a willy in your pants
that's not a willy it's just a
a really long pimple at any rate well
i'm just so confused i don't really know
what i
am it's all so confusing
you're like oh yeah why is that somehow
and
you're definitely at least author huh
did i get that right pie am i being
diplomatic enough
totally larry you are so diplomatic
diplomatic rhymes with dick
hi are you still there no your
incredible text has me hiding way in the
back of my memory
i i don't know what you're all talking
about at any rate
well i'm just so confused i don't really
it's all
i have to get going don't eat limbs
unless you know where they came from
so
could you come back in here
what is it now
how long have you actually been living
on the island oh
for quite a while now but do you know
where
you were before i only have a vague
memory
i was very young but that doesn't matter
we're living in paradise here
as long as we follow the holy book
what is your holy book it contains all
the rules we need to live a good life
it tells us what is right and what is
wrong the book is really old
but it was damaged fortunately we were
able to put it back together
but uh sometimes i'd like to try some of
the things that are wrong
who doesn't but whenever we do something
that is not according to the rules in
the holy book
sister superior comes to haunt us she
makes her way through the village
and scares us i was talking to otis the
other day and i noticed how good she
smells
somehow kind of spicy different from
everyone else here it may be curious but
then the sisters superior appeared and
yelled at me to keep my hands to myself
about all this what about her so you're
kind of curious about
her yes there's something about her
that's kind of
manly sister superior can't be allowed
to hear this
of course i'm just curious about what it
would be like with her
you know is that normal i think i'm the
only one here that feels that way
sister if you're asking this guy what
normal is
you've come to the wrong place quiet pie
there's nothing wrong with you being
attracted him
i mean her i mean after all you've
already had a look in my pants
have you forgotten that that's not
necessarily representative and it might
put someone off
i will turn you off in a second maybe
you should just talk to otis again
i can't do that i'm on guard duty and i
can't just walk away
and how am i supposed to know if i'd
even really be interested in the
contents of his pants
maybe something can be done about that
can i have an audience with the queen of
course not
the queen is given strict orders that
she is not to be disturbed
why what is she doing she says she's
organizing us
you must admit that sounds like an
excuse to take a nap quiet
see you later
so
that wendy girl finds you interesting
really
that that would be great you like her
too
when i look at her something happens
down there
that sounds familiar so you're
interested in wendy
she's interested in you but i'm really
not certain she's
actually interested in me look at
yourself
a man like you
you're barbaric tresses and then there's
your synorious powerful voice not to
forget
you're penetrating masculine gaze
so you're right i
really am completely manly well maybe i
should actually reach out to wendy but
how can i make her curious about me well
you're wearing that loincloth
it gives me a lot of freedom down below
and everything dangles so nicely i've
learned that nowadays people send each
other photos up there
you know what's a photo just let me take
one wendy will be
thrilled if you say so
okay hold still let me take a picture
does it hurt only should put it on the
internet
well let's not talk about that
what is it now
i have a photo here that might interest
you
show me
wow so this is what they look like
ungrilled are they
all so hairy all depends on where you
shave
well i like it maybe you should talk to
otis about this
that's a good idea but i'm not supposed
to leave my post
i won't tell if you take off for a bit
thanks you're a
real friend i'm just so curious oh this
can't wait to see you either
have fun
great the coast is clear
this seems to be a recruitment brochure
i'll just take it with me
yes
nice freezer maybe i can do something
with it
i'll take a photo of it
maybe i should put it on so that it
slows me down a little
shhh
larry if some of the founding fathers
died here in the archipelago
and there are lots of graves here
sometimes you even think along
but i can't just dig up every grave in
the area
we have to know which one we want
there's something written on it instant
contact with the dead
please add something that was loved
something from the body of a descendant
something from the body of the deceased
wax to bind everything
and finally some fine spice then take
the bag to the grave
i'll just give it a tap all right that's
it
no harm done
the gravestone reads if it moves you can
screw it
wait a minute bobby said that's the
cockburn motto this must be his grave
no one around then here we go
there's something golden in this pocket
i'll take that bobby will be happy
that's a strange signet ring it's way
too big for a finger
and what's with that funny little knob
no longer usable nothing in there
empty just lint
i don't need that i have a strong sense
of direction
i'm not a woman
there's a note i'll take it with me this
is the second page of cockburn's diary
he described the way to lady gobble
dick's grave it begins in the clearing
by the beach
the g marks the spot then there are some
directions
i can't do anything like that
here lie sister superior frigid
that's fine just the way it is
the dirt's so loose i don't need a
shovel
yikes a skeletal hand
oops i broke a finger off it
well that will have to do
those can't be combined
that won't help
good idea but that won't work
something that was loved
wax to bind everything
some fine spice
i'm not sticking my finger in there that
looks pretty poisonous
i hope this doesn't corrode the cup
so
i'm not looking to move in
i'm not looking to move in
i'm not look
i want to have a closer look at that
ah the two of them actually got together
i think i should just leave them alone
otherwise wendy will lock me up again
that's too far away
the other day i ordered an escort
service those two
they didn't want to jerk me off they
just wanted to heal me all the time
instead they told me that's what happens
when you're an escort at a party so i
said
i get the party bit
here's your joke book
ah here it is finally some quality humor
from the old days
there's even an appendix in the back
that lists who you can insult
with which joke here you can have this
role-playing now
thanks so everyone welcome to my show
everything's good to go now i have my
tried and true repertoire of jokes again
i'd like to apologize to all the fringe
groups i might offend
like women this is now a safe space
for tasteless humor people here we still
make jokes like in the old things
no one here has to apologize for the
humor
everything still goes here you can
get naked in front of people and uh
okay maybe not everything
all right hold on to your hats
a blonde crashes a helicopter the
investigating officer asks i'll take one
why
she says it got cold in here so i turned
off the fan
why do older blondes park even worse
than young blondes
because hearing gets worse with age
freshly pressed is always the best oh
yeah
the blondes hey let me try some
different materials
you can't just make fun of blondes all
the time
after all we also have the foreigners
what do you call a foreigner who owns
their own home
adopted
okay let's see what i can do
so
i can connect the recorder here it's
recording now
okay let's see what i can do
the recorder recorded my beautiful piano
playing
i'll take him back with me
so
look bobby i have your family's signet
ring
what that's really it
the legendary signet ring i never
thought i'd actually get to hold it
don't mention it can i have the stone in
the lobby now of course
but i should first make sure that the
signet ring works properly what do you
mean
so that's how a signet ring works not
all of them
i'll let you know if i find another one
what the hell was that no idea it
sounded like it came from the lobby
kip's probably fooling around again
this time i was faster want it then show
me what you can do and find me
but i've gone to ground in a place that
you'll have to find
do you remember the last time we met and
you were so bound by me
there you'll find a clue and the other
clue is hidden where john sits
if you're as good as i think you are
that should be enough
i'll put the note in my pocket
so
hmm those could be coordinates
those look like some kind of coordinates
oh a submarine i'd love to have one of
these myself
yeah and i sure picked a nice place for
our next meeting
you think a submarine is a nice place
i've never had sex underwater
ah i'm sure i'm looking sharp
i can't just open it i have to enter a
code first
state secret passphrase to open door
is it something with that ken guy again
passphrase incorrect leave
say this is the computer you use to
access your security cameras right
exactly nothing on the island escapes me
can i take a look at the footage from
the camera on your buoy
what for uh an evil woman tried to dump
something in the ocean
and i want her brought to justice what
then have a look you have got to be
kidding me
okay that seems to be the right camera
i'll just rewind until something happens
there state secret passphrase to open
door
lottie's olympic passphrase
correct
that's not very nicer
state secret passphrase to open door
hmm let's see i don't want to say that
pie could you say that into the mic nope
do it yourself
larry's a limp dick
passphrase correct
it's larry
why does she have a cardboard cut out of
me what are all these notes and
documents
oh boy she's a genuine stalker
nice to see you notice that too i should
find that stone
quickly and get out of here
hello yeah my is that you
what damn it i need somewhere to hide
if i stand directly in front of it
hopefully she won't see me
headquarters yanmai reporting what's up
uh you called me did i never mind
report as i suspected agent larry seems
to have a plan
it involves a cave he plans to take face
to
but he needs a keystone to do that i
have one of the pieces here i can use it
to lure him into a trap
steal the other pieces and get inside
the cave myself
good that's what i like to hear do you
have any
idea how you plan to kill him when the
time comes
i'm going to drop him into the volcano
lovely
you completely disintegrate in the lava
there will be nothing left of him
above all he will suffer excruciating
agony yes oh enviable
pardon me oh nothing over and out
i'll just move some things around
what that's an alarm she must have
discovered me
i need somewhere to hide
if i stand directly in front of it
hopefully she won't see me
larry i know you're here somewhere a
super agent like you knows every hiding
spot
you're here
who's there come out
hi it's me what you actually fell for it
disappointing that you let yourself be
lured here so easily
now tell me what are your plans now
that's a secret and i'll probably never
be able to get that from you oh
it's just about the keystone once i get
that bill
i can open the cave and then faith can
get a memory back
it's not any huge secret or anything i
bet he's trying to throw me off the
scent
he infiltrated the submarine he has
probably discovered everything about me
and is just playing dumb
i have to be careful so that he doesn't
get any more secrets out of me
i don't have any choice i'll have to
kill him using my deadly thai
squeezer
i need somewhere to hide i can hide in
there
at least i hope i don't end up standing
myself
agent larry you're here somewhere
i know where you're hiding
no but there's fluff from your chest
hair on the curtain
you were here next time i'll find you
he's here somewhere i should lock the
stone
away
i'll just move some things around
what that's an alarm she must have
discovered me
i need somewhere to hide
i'll hide behind this
there's only one place you can be agent
larry
and that's in here or not but
there's dandruff on the floor and it's
definitely yours i'll find you
who messed everything up i have to fix
this
um
just move some things around
what that's an alarm she must have
discovered me
i need somewhere to hide if i stand
directly in front of it
hopefully she won't see me
agent larry you're here somewhere
i know where you're hiding
no but there's fluff from your chest
hair on the curtain
you were here next time i'll find you
who messed everything up i have to fix
this
got it
yes it opened the safe the stone's in
there
got you
just one second damn it uh hello yamai
i knew i could lure you here agent
lottie you'll do anything to accomplish
your mission won't you
and you won't give up um i'm kind of in
a hurry
maybe you could just wait a minute i
have a little surprise
for you
ah you really did wait and oh
wow it was worth it
baby that was
the best sex since last time you're
still alive
you really did me up good but if you
want to kill me
you'll have to try harder than that
larry that's
unbelievable that's just the effect i
always have on women
hey what's wrong now typical takes what
she wants and then just
takes off oh well my heart belongs to
faith anyway
boy i bet you'll be happy about that
hopefully she won't want to have sex the
moment she remembers me
sooner or later even i need a break
whoo so that's that we're heading back
to the island pie
good thing i feel so constricted on
submarines
can't you let him leave with a stone
agent larry will be able to retrieve all
the pieces of the keystone
all we have to do is observe him let him
do all the actual work
and then you strike when he's done oh
very good i like your new uniform
mr wang hello
nobody here i should come back later
then again now i could find out
something about him
yes
he had security cameras installed
throughout the company
except for in his own office of course
oh i have to hurry
not even password protected oh
wait that's not this can't be
mr wang can display whatever any pi
phone camera in the world is seeing on
his computer
he has a folder here with his favorite
scenes
oh the thumbnails alone are bad enough
although this is interesting no nori
don't click it in any case mr wang is
spying on everyone's bedrooms out there
when i think about the secret project
he could use that too oh god i can't let
that happen
it's time for resistance
larry something i've always wanted to
ask you what is it
what would you consider the best
possible life so what would make a
perfect day for you
oh i can imagine a lot of things of
course i would be happily married to a
beautiful woman
who does all the housework while you put
your feet up no way
how old-fashioned do you think i am we'd
have a maid for that
of course first off on a perfect day
i'd sleep in real life and then my
beautiful wife would call me to
breakfast
what's your favorite breakfast
scrambled eggs with crispy fried bacon
nice and what's your favorite drink at
breakfast
fresh orange shoes hand pressed by naked
women good choice
and you like it when your wife serves
you like that huh what do you take me
for
some kind of chauvinist the maid can do
all that of course
well maybe it's the maid's day off but i
wouldn't complain if my wife did all
that for me
okay good to know
it worked we survived the waves
i'm adding the island to the navigation
app larry
i found something else about that ship
graveyard in the file
really apparently captain muffington
tried to stop the marquis plans
but some huge waves smashed his ship the
unsatisfied
onto a reef the ship sank as a result
with him aboard
which means that his keystone probably
went down with him
you might be able to find some more
clues here on the island
that thing will probably bite my fingers
if i take that
down polly ah not polly not polly
yes i know you're not polly
we already talked that out
i don't think he's going to let me walk
right by
he seems to like those i hope he doesn't
go into sugar shock
hey how did you get in here how did you
manage to get past satoshi
i'm a genius you
definitely have a sense of humor wait
you weren't
serious were you no of course not i'm
larry
larry laffer so what are you guys doing
here you
are standing in the headquarters of a
startup that will change the world
ah what are you selling we're not
selling anything
we're revolutionizing payment and
encryption on the internet you have to
pay on the internet now
hey not us of course we are pirates
oh man docs don't start acting all high
and mighty now
but we are pirates like cuck and the
fearless buccaneers we're corporate
pirates so to speak
you must know what a cryptocurrency is
right
there's that one superhero guy who can't
take it okay
so you don't know we have invented a
revolutionary new cryptocurrency
we call it clitcoin our sophisticated
blockchain is super secure
and makes shopping with the wallet
really easy the whole financial world
trembles before us
exactly that's why we had to move into
international waters instead of opening
our headquarters in a major city
they're all afraid of us they can't
touch us
here and we can safely run the servers
that host our cryptocurrency
plus there's plenty of room to cool them
down efficiently with water
there's plenty of that here
look larry she has to put up with those
guys the same way i do with you
we're still having a little trouble with
internet speed but it's nothing my
little technical genius can't handle
right docs gotta recompile the kernel so
we can lower the server load
increase the bit rate and uh improve the
latency take about half an hour
awesome
can you explain that tech thing you guys
do with the crypto stuff again
i get the feeling that you lack the
professional background for that
hey i used to program video games
really then cryptocurrency is out of
your league
what do you do with it well it's an
uncrackable database
what for for everything for example
look i don't have time to teach anyone
the basics right now we're about to
launch
i'm looking for a specific ship there's
more than enough of those around here
an old sailing ship be unsatisfied oh
i know that wreck where's the moored
it's not moored
it sank we lowered our water cooler
server right next to it
did you see some kind of keystone or
something no but i didn't bother to take
a good look at the wreck
we're building the future here not
wasting our time on some
old relic
are you by any chance in need of a
competent first officer to join your
pirate crew
you mean you want to join up at least
he's wearing a sailor outfit
i believe my crew is already complete
leadership vision and organization
are my personal responsibility docs is
in charge of the technical
implementation
so as you can see we have no need for
any further help hey
i'm here too oh yeah right
we even filled our internship position
and that wasn't easy because we have
such high standards
think i'll just sail off now
hi there huh i'm larry larry laffer
sadie any plans for today
oh sure the usual just stand here and be
ignored
i don't know how anyone could ignore you
oh
these two don't seem to have any trouble
doing that oh wait a minute
are you hitting on me
sure oh lord am i supposed to be happy
that somebody even notices me
a lot i'm not so sure anymore cut it out
okay if you say so
well your outfit is definitely piratey
the cook insists that i wear it he says
it's our corporate identity and
important for public perception
you have a company headquarters on an
island that is almost impossible to
reach because huge waves smash
everything and you're worried about
marketing he's not too receptive to
logic
but i'm starting to get used to the
saber i'll probably need it
how did you end up here hey i could get
so mad
two weeks ago i finished my degree what
did you study
business administration so i saw this
job ad for an internship in a startup
developing
cryptocurrency i thought hey that'd be a
perfect springboard for me
then i'd work in silicon valley for a
few months gain a lot of practical
experience and if a company suits me
maybe i'd go all in and here i am at
least you got the job
but i was the only one to apply all the
cook wants from me is
coffee and he acts like i'm his
secretary and i'm not allowed to do
anything in management
he says the only one captain can man the
helm
and then all he does is stand outside
and look out to see with that telescope
or
feed that inter-headed parrot maybe
he'll get your shot
not lightly he's only keeping me around
so he can claim that he values diversity
is there anything i can do to help you
with your job you can help me find
something else don't tell him this but
i'm already looking for a better job
there must be a place where my skills
are really needed i hope i don't have to
move again
that captain is a little weird above all
he is not a captain
i have absolutely no idea why he wears
that outfit
he spent the whole voyage here hanging
over the railing and puking
see you later
you're not happy with your job as an
intern take a look at this
this will be something for you
oh that does sound interesting could be
something for me
granted you may have to learn to accept
their dietary habits
oh i'm sure a vegan day in the cafeteria
could be arranged
in any case this is a group that really
appreciates female confidence
and where they have a good goal-oriented
organization
i think you could really bring something
to the table there
okay so where can i find them on muffin
to thailand
you can't miss them so what do i do now
i don't need anything right now but
maybe you can give docs a hand
he's tweaking something on the server
right now
why the ungrateful
can i be the new intern now do you think
you're up to the job we are first movers
and shakers here and we break things
i break things all the time do you have
experience i was an
intern at prune way too big
way too lame they used to be innovative
but
now what exactly did you do there
stripper in turn fine
we can give it a try great so what do i
do now
i don't need anything right now but
maybe you can give dox a hand
he's tweaking something on the server
right now on it
think i'll just sail off now
hey what
what exactly do you do here i'm the
technical manager
you must have a lot of experience you
know it dude you have no idea of the
places i've hacked into
that blackout in you lost wages a while
back dude
that was me but the power goes out all
the time because the grid is so bad
that's what the powers that bc to keep
people calm hey
if you need me to get you anything from
the dark net let me know
hey you're playing a game on your laptop
that's so not true
look you just hit a boss key and now
it's showing a spreadsheet
what you still remember that you know
more about technology than i thought
so what are you playing fart night never
heard of it
what's the deal 100 players get dropped
on an island
and have to kill each other couldn't
they just have a huge orgy
dude you really just don't get computer
games
it's about killing not sex
hey i'm the new intern you can get out
of my face i'm just fixing something on
the server
i can help with that man first i gotta
remember exactly where the server went
down there is one thing that might help
me
bring me a refill on my energy drink
dude my concentration is really tanking
what is that i don't care as long as
it's got serene in it i'll have a look
around
i have to go
is this one of those energy trees you
wanted
ah this is the good stuff great
now i remember the coordinates where we
lowered the water cooled server
it's 11 and 13. how can you forget
something
hey when you're hacking as hard as i am
you can lose track of stuff
you mean playing quiet intern
show some respect for people in
leadership positions but if you want to
get smart
then you take care of the server it's
running too slow right now
we have to hit the turbo button you can
do that from here
no only manually on the server on the
server that you lowered into the sea
in a place you had just forgotten i told
you to show some respect for people in
leadership positions
okay i'll see what i can do where can i
find the diving gear
how should i know i'm not diving down
there myself i have allergies
underwater show a little initiative for
once
jeez why you have to hold your interns
hands for every little thing these days
so
you can never have too much paper
bye
mm-hmm
this must be the place where the
server's submerged
okay brochure tells me how to do the
whole diving thing
couldn't you have somehow improvised a
diving bell you know
find a salad bowl somewhere here in the
archipelago
seal it with tape supply it with air
from a converted fire extinguisher and
all that that would have been more your
style
yeah but there wasn't any budget left
for assets what are
assets i don't know but the voices in my
head say they're too expensive
in fact every one of our sentences is an
asset
okay then i'll shut up now it's a good
thing we can't talk underwater anyway
chalk another one off the list
that must be the unsatisfying the
with which the founding fathers
discovered the archipelago
there's a keystone nearby i can feel it
maybe you just have deep sea sickness
and that back there
has to be the surfer doctor talking
about
i'll take it with me the forks provide
buoyancy
i'll untie the water wings and take them
with me they're really buoyant
i'm not laying so much as a fingertip on
that
yeah it gives a little lift to the bomb
but it's not enough
they want me to rev up the server all
right here we go
looks like it's still got some untapped
reserves
maybe i better take cover
good thing with all that
hmm
well well i recommend waiting before we
do a test run
i was only able to implement the basic
functions tests
aren't concluded yet my algorithm still
isn't optimal and it's still a long way
from being self-learning
but the total package is still good
enough that we can start delivering
right
uh not really we'll deliver the software
as an update over the cloud you know but
the main thing is to get the pie box
into people's bedrooms first
i beg your pardon i thought the pie bot
was supposed to assist people in daily
life
in people's homes i meant of course come
on
let's give it a test run if you say so
okay maybe we shouldn't ship right away
but i'm sure you'll be able to solve
that problem with a couple of little
software updates sweetie it's not that
simple
don't take me for a foo it's not just a
company's future on the line here
it's yours too we'll just see about that
and get this junk out of here it's so
ugly
nobody's going to want something like
that will do
that junk just might come in handy
larry i'd be interested to hear your
thoughts on the perfect day
say around noonish
at noon my wife would be massaging me by
the pool
over cocktails which cocktail
massive erection purple nurple you
didn't just make that one up did you
what a vile accusation it's the most
famous cocktail on the whole
island of jake jamaica doria
a massage would go well with that
wouldn't it
a foot massage very nice at any rate i
don't have any appointments
and little tipsy why not anyway i spend
all day just
loafing around the house carefree
totally carefree
there's a g on the column that must have
been what cockburn meant in his diary
this is the starting point for his
directions
i always thought a gene never marked the
spot you should be proud of yourself for
even finding that spot
it was pretty ticklish though
oh god there's a dead body lying there
is that lady goblin unlikely unless you
became a mail carrier
oh right that explains all those fed sex
packages
look i think this is a suicide note
hmm it's addressed to someone named
wilson i think i should just leave it
where it is
good call
hi i found it this must be lady gobble
dick's secret grave
a secret grave in a rather exposed
location
no time to lose you seem to be
developing a taste for digging graves
i can't dig that with my hands
hmm why does that always happen to me
when i try to get close to women
fate i think i can still make out the
coffin but
i'd have to get a better fix on it
i'm not gonna swim there
so
hi maybe i can use the telescope to find
lady galdick's coffin at sea
good idea give it a try so let's see
that's lady gobble dick's coffin i guess
it didn't really make it that
far it looks like the coffin is exactly
midway between muffington island
and gofuku island hi can you
triangulate the what do you call
triangulate the coordinates
that's not how it works larry you'll
just have to guess the exact position
on the map
um
deduction the fan is an indication that
she sustained a facial injury that she
wanted to conceal
and even if it were true it still
wouldn't help
i'll take the letter with me it says my
beloved regibald
i'm afraid my time is running out i fear
i may suffer from consumption
i can barely breathe forever yours
lady gobble dick hmm she was having
trouble
breathing
deduction lady gobble dick stole some
gold from reginald cockburn
and he killed her uh that's nonsense
larry
deduction the hand symbolizes that she
was
reaching for eternal life or maybe
just that she has a hand because she's
human that could also be the case
deduction she combed the entire island
but
never found the keystone then you're no
better than she was
deduction the earring is part of a
cursed aztec treasure the only thing
cursing around here is me
open wide and say ah
hmm there's something in her throat i
think i can get it out
it's part of the keystone many thanks
m'lady
mr wang not now sweetie my favorite show
is coming on
korea's got great big parents there's
women in bikinis
and i found something belonging to faith
the algorithm no but
a hint yes i searched her work files and
came across her personal recordings
oh send them all to me most of their
recordings are just reflections on how
the tech market is changing
the challenges facing humanity and how
to meet them no nudie pictures
no boring moving on
i found these recordings
captain's log 2357 i've achieved a
breakthrough with the self-learning
algorithm
after installation on a pie it developed
so fast in a very short time
that it appeared almost human but that's
when the problem started
the test pie also began to develop
irrational
traits it became downright mega maniacal
like it knew too much i had no choice
but to stop the experiment
and erase the test by this software is
revolutionary
and a threat i have to continue to
refine it
and find another element that prevents
it from developing to such an extreme
until then i can't risk this algorithm
falling into the wrong hands
no telling what would happen if it got
into an interconnected system
i'm not going to store the algorithm on
any of prune servers
but instead i'm going to keep it close
to me at all times
i have to perfect the algorithm myself
first
me alone captain's log out
what does that mean it means that only
faith knows where she hid the algorithm
and that we don't have to search the
company's servers anymore
maybe it also means yes that we
shouldn't pursue this project any
further
faith was afraid of it i don't even know
the meaning of fear
i want that algorithm if we can't get
that i want my own algorithm build me my
algorithm little girl
or i'll send you to korea's got great
big talents
although looking at you i guess there
wouldn't be much point
ah off with you
larry how do you imagine the evening of
your perfect day going
at some point my wife asks me what i
want for dinner that's because the
maid's still on her day off
exactly and you can't cook ah you know
me so well
what's your favorite dish
meatloaf made from local ingredients
okay then we enjoy a
very romantic dinner and afterwards
let me guess sex and as
always i was right my beautiful wife is
waiting for me in her
sexy lingerie and then
well you know that would be my
perfect day and you know what every day
could be like that for all i care
i can well imagine you'd like that
uh
so
um
no i'd rather do my falling down at
lefties
i don't want to brag but i built a
bridge with my own two hands
i'll just sling that in my pants
um
now the bun is fully impregnated with
alcohol
i don't think i could roll that out of
the way
that should make for an interesting meal
right
aha you pig you won't be stealing any
more buns for a while
you can smell the booze on that thing
from here
i hereby adopt you and chris knew pig
bird
now it just looks like swingle suit
come my little friend
now his outfit looks just like swingles
hold still this won't hurt there now the
face has been swingilized
oh
yes the orchid seems to like that
something's happening
right compliments i mean it's a plant
shouldn't be too hard
hey pretty flower are you always that
direct well
we don't want to waste any time larry
that orchid's old enough to be the one
the founding fathers stood before
okay greetings oh colorful bounty of the
soil was that good
well i guess it was enough keep going
how give it compliments
what stunning leaves i like that
keep it up
no other plant graces the archipelago
with such beauty
hey you're really getting the hang of
this i have to say
i'm impressed by your seduction skills i
think you've paid her enough compliments
oh larry it's opened what an incredible
moment
wait the bud in the middle still hasn't
quite opened
that's the most important thing without
that there's no way i can study
the orchid properly something's still
missing there's something in the marquis
notes
i have discovered something that makes
this orchid unique
it responds to lust physical love and
its proximity
makes it bloom huh that could mean it's
sensitive to
pheromones pheromones that people give
off during sex
maybe we should motivate the orchid a
little
the things we do for environmental
protection
yuck who is that well i'm pretty sure
he's not alive anymore
that disgusting plant also spat out a
piece of parchment
don't call it disgusting it's beautiful
it's a note from the marquis de canard
then that must be him but how did he end
up
inside the plant
hi could you scan the parchment and
decipher the text of course
just a second processing
i found out something about myself in
the cavern of cosmic cognition that i
should never have learned
no one should have this knowledge no one
should ever enter the cave again
curse cockburn and gobble dick i told
them i was going to throw myself into
the volcano
let them believe that but i'll only
throw away my keystone at the volcano
for myself
i have found a much more beautiful place
to die i shall crawl in
and never come out again which he
obviously did but the plant is blooming
we did it larry thank you so much for
your support in making it happen
that's exactly the kind of support i'm
known for
could you take nora her climbing gear i
can't leave right now
i need to examine the plant
sure thing if we bring nora her
equipment we can search the volcano for
the stone
i guess our first lead was right after
all the marquee wrote that he threw the
stone away there somewhere then let's
get going
uh
hmm
dora sends her guards as well and gave
me this for you
my climbing equipment great then i can
finally continue my search for the pod
gecko
hopefully i can manage it this time
without everything going wrong
nora is that the pod gekko over there
no that's some weird guy who lives up
here on the volcano
okay right he came out of that weird
door just as i was climbing up
what are you doing on my volcano
go away
hold not one more step what's your name
what do you want i'm larry larry laffer
i
bought this volcano what impossible
this is my volcano nobody else can have
it
calm down i am calm
who are you no no what do you mean no
that's my name
no no doctor no no oh so
you're a doctor i am a genius
but i could also serve as a doctor and
operate on you i'll get my knives
your thyroid gland is exactly what i
need
mine is all acting up no thanks
everything inside is working just fine
the whole world will tremble before me
uh yeah forget i asked
why are you living up here this is my
secret headquarters
from where i can control everything this
island
and soon the whole world
where's the headquarters it's inside the
volcano
where the lava can't reach hidden behind
a huge waterfall
and it's full of state-of-the-art
technology unbelievable
the whole world will really tremble
before you
yeah yeah
don't you get bored up here never i cast
my eye across
the world and make plans for what i will
do when i have
conquered it but up here there's no bar
no movies no music
music piano no piano
hero evil i'm
sorry i didn't mean to scare you oh no
he's not
scared
could you step aside a bit nobody tells
me where to stand on my
volcano you never know where a piano
might be laying in wait for you
the piano where it's okay there's
nothing here
ah don't mind me i'm just looking around
yes go away
i have to connect something to it that
needs electricity
sounds good to me a piano
a piano
i think he ran away hopefully not into
the lava
now you think of that
the piano music scared that weirdo off i
wonder what's wrong with him
ah there's the keystone i was looking
for
hello you here yes status i've assembled
the group
we're waiting for instructions good i
still have a few things to prepare
and then i have to cover my tracks i've
also sent a message to
el comendante he'll arrive soon
then we can plan how to destroy prune
excellent it's time for la revolucion
the socket's secure now
yeah yeah
i can see something through the hole
i can see something through the hole
that huge rock
i can see something through the hole
hmm
ah that worked the entrance to the ruins
is now open
the door handle seems to be coupled to
the trapdoor
a lizard statue i can imagine who's
going to go nuts over that
i'm not standing on that i'm not crazy
i'm not touching that if i do it'll
probably shoot out a gazillion knives or
something
that doesn't look like i can just push
it open
hey smokey bear you're in here too larry
laffer redshirt this is the man i was
telling
you about who opened my eyes to the
great
truth oh it's an honor i hope i too may
experience an awakening like that
what have you been up to smokey not so
loud they have microphones
everywhere if i'm not careful they'll
track me down again
oh right i had to leave new lost wages
in a hurry
because they picked up my scent they
were everywhere
the man on the bus who kept looking at
me the ticket machine
was watching me and then there was
this cat it was in league with them
i then went to louisiana for a
conference on the secret world
conspiracy that's where i learned so
many more hidden truths
111 that's where i also received a flyer
for a galactic festival here on this
island there was supposed to be lectures
about the aliens
who landed here a long time ago and
founded a high
culture supposedly they hid their
profound
knowledge about mankind here a place
where you can discover the final insight
into yourself
i heard about that too that's what i'm
saying
there must be something to it anyway the
festival was a disaster
i don't know who organized it but
nothing worked
but at least i met these other folks who
are organizing a larp
don't tell them but i think they
actually believe
it's just a game and that's when it's
the path to true
self-discovery
who calls our kid red shirt we didn't
want to bother to think one up first
and then have him drop dead anyway what
that's what those two guys over there
said i have no idea what they meant
either
but i'm an important member of the crew
we agreed on that
i don't understand any of this but
those two seem to know what they're
talking about my real name is captain
dickhard
whatever anyway we're here for a larp
what's supposed to happen in this larp i
want to find traces of an
ancient civilization they could be
behind the current conspiracy
and i expect an interstellar adventure
alien races with whom we can live in
peace
a real step forward for mankind wisdom
and peace
earlier you said something about wanting
to kick some alien ass
um for purely dramaturgical reasons of
course
besides i really like to experience a
fist fight against a lizard man
where he shreds my shirt and everyone
sees my muscles
lizardmen where i never should have
thrown my old tin foil hat in the trash
this new one is crap of course it can be
a first contact because that would
require following a different directive
where are the lizardmen easy smoky easy
i haven't seen any that only means that
they're
well hidden but without a game master
nothing's gonna happen
those two bozos over there know exactly
how this should work
i could be your game master you think
this is something for you
oh let him give it a try as long as i
can fight lizard man
but we also need the perfect setting did
you find something
yes i know the perfect place to hold a
great larp
oh great let's go
okay let's go i can hardly wait i don't
like this place
they're watching me i can feel it start
already
start already so your spaceship crashed
on an alien planet
there you find the remains of an ancient
civilization good start
something approaches it's
a disembodied intelligence oh
like in episode 165
you quickly the creature possesses
a statue of a lizard all right
the lizard comes to life with a grating
sound it comes closer and closer
i consult the starfleet manual for the
rules of conduct for first contact with
possessed lizard statues
uh yeah that too but then it
winds up to crush you you
modulate your tricorder's pulse
frequency to alpha seven
because that would recalibrate the
lizard statues molecular structures
um yeah that's what i was about to say
the statue has frozen you quickly
clear your next move with starfleet
command
yes that's exactly what i'll do
great story what do i do now the lizard
statue is standing on a deadly trapdoor
it slowly awakens once more
at the last moment you pull the lever
yes
the aliens kidnapped him
hello everything okay down there did i
defeat the disembodied intelligence
of course you are the hero of the day
that was great i even ripped my shirt
and started bleeding
but why is my leg so twisted oh
are those my bones uh i'll call the
ship's doctor
man it's dark in here i should put some
light on the subject first
that looks pretty dangerous hmm i think
i know who's looking for something just
like this
hello is there anybody still there
i gotta admit this does hurt a little
bit
could i maybe have some starfleet
tablets
oh there's something rustling around
here
maybe it's an orion slave girl oh it's a
badger
no badger don't lick the blood off i
don't want you drink on my leg either
ouch
take that damn get that swag get out of
here
i hope it doesn't come back with
reinforcements or anything
like the kardashians
what are you doing here on the island we
came here for the galactic festival
it was supposed to be a one-of-a-kind
event galactic creatures
lots of action and music they promised
that nothing would be impossible
and women yeah
loads of stars were supposed to be here
they weren't
total flop no stars
we almost drowned and then there was the
storm
all a total waste but we found a few
like-minded people here and we thought
let's do a larp
i know my way around lawrence well of
course it's
pretty obvious that you're doing one of
your own about that old dance film
hey i could be your game master who you
you don't look the type you have no idea
just how much imagination i really have
you just have to have enough for each of
us here of course
but we also want to play in a location
that's just
perfect for us what do you have in mind
uh we want to be heroes
and tackle deadly traps the more
dangerous
the better you know anywhere like that
yes i know the perfect place to hold a
great larp what do you say kyle
you want to give it a try let's do it
can't be any more boring than here then
let's go
okay let's get started i hope it's about
a really sexy space
princess okay why not
so uh a beautiful princess named
leela the most beautiful woman in the
universe
was kidnapped from the palace on her
home planet of
sex mania just a few hours ago
and the perpetrators are fiendish aliens
who want to do
terrible things to her
what's she wearing
a bikini made of gold perfect
fortunately two glorious heroes have
taken up the trail to save her
that's us finley i know dumbass uh keep
going
the two penetrate the space station
where their princess is being held
prisoner they fight their way through
to the detention block but it is full of
deadly traps awesome i can almost see
the princess in front of me
yeah i'm totally into it too we
have to save her the princess is waiting
for her two heroes
yet fate has strewn their path with many
a deadly track or the aliens hey
this has to really stimulate our
imaginations
yeah i really want to picture the palace
in my mind
the best thing would be to turn off the
light so that we can really
live out our roles in the dark great
idea
okay i can do that
i'll turn out the lights now and your
adventure begins
tell us exactly what we need to do to
meet the deadly challenges ahead
okay that shouldn't be a problem they
won't be lethal
i hope
so you're approached by a vicious
tentacled monster you
leap forward hold on princess we're on
our way
and you can lose that gold bikini let's
go
bam bam you escape the tentacled monster
but palace guards start to appear the
guards are
shooting at you you
duck as low as you can
the shots are causing the walls to
collapse
you
roll forward uh watch out over there
we're coming princess but then
the intergalactical death beams appear
out of the walls
you
you run straight ahead as fast as you
can
we're almost there nothing can stop us
hurry
it worked we beat all the traps
that was a great adventure larry so
what's next
well you guys did your part to save the
princess
she is at your feet eternally grateful
soon she will remove her gold bikini and
summon you to her chambers
and what do we do till then
you'll just have to wait here
it's pretty dirty in here there seem to
be some symbols but
they're barely visible under the dirt
doesn't look like it will open just like
that
so
as game master i can offer you a great
story really can i clean up in there too
really the best would be if it takes
place in a filthy dump where i have to
make a heroic effort to clean up is
there anywhere like that around here
yeah i know exactly where i can offer
you a great larp
my mop is hungry let's roll
as far as i understand it you have to
tell an exciting story now
and i have to use my skills to respond
to it exactly
right hmm you assume the role of
sanitation captain roger oh
aliens have attacked the spaceship in
which you are part of the crew
it's transporting a unique star
generator
you are now the last surviving crew
member
i like this you barely managed to escape
from the spaceship with an escape
capsule
and land on a strange planet and
i clean it no there you stumble across
a floating head and then
you fight a terrible creature on the
planet and then
continue your journey oh that sounds
pretty improvised to me in a nearby city
you buy a small spaceship that needs
cleaning you manage to fly back to the
spaceship
carrying the star generator and
infiltrate it
using every iota of your intelligence
you trick the aliens and make your way
to the star
generator in order to
clean it yeah just my thing where is
this star generator thing i have to
clean
right here on the floor then i'll get
right to it sanitation captain roger
cleans
to save the world as we know it
ah that worked
hi we did it there it is the cavern of
cosmic cognition uh larry cavern
sure it's clearly a cave that round
thing is the entrance
anyone can see that take a closer look
where
i give up
foreign
the long bit slides into the right place
well-rounded
round and tight
the stone fits perfectly
that was the last stone something's
happening
i don't feel like there's any cosmic
cognition wafting out of there
more like kind of a musty smell who
knows how long that door was closed and
what might be lurking
inside
hello i'm in the city el comandante
has the group assembled everyone's
waiting at the secret headquarters
good we're on our own no one's going to
suddenly appear to help us
this revolution is something we must do
ourselves
we have no choice mr wang is dangerous
we can't let him deliver the pie bots
once they're in every home and he
activates them and the secret functions
are installed the way he
wants and if he can get his hands on
faith self-learning ai and install it
he would be invincible yes
wang would have an army of super robots
in every home in america
robots he could control like puppets
it will not come to that we will prevent
it
see you later at the secret headquarters
and
nori yes trust no one
i'm not going in there until i have
faith with me i've got to find a way to
convince her to come here
hey you oh boy
i met with wendy and it was really great
i finally know who i am and what to do
with myself
if you hadn't helped me larry oh i'm so
grateful
when it comes to manliness i know my
business
so what's next for you two we gonna meet
up again later and
pick up where we left off that's the
spirit
hey you oh no
thanks for setting me up with otis uh no
problem
matchmaking is one of my specialties so
how was it oh it was incredible your
thing was so
small and wrinkled otis's on the other
hand was huge
well after a while and so hard and it
smelled
so good as opposed to yours just limp
and hung there and besides
i get it already well anyway
i wanted to say thank you and in return
i'm going to let you go but don't you
dare tell anyone oh
and try not to do anything stupid
my sisters still don't like you i'll do
my best but
you might earn their favor if you were
to drive off sister superior's ghost
and it was particularly bad again last
night yeah i could hardly sleep
she was haunting us until dawn gliding
all over the place
whispering i hate it when she whispers
can you understand what she says
something about wanting to protect us
maybe it'd be better if she let us get a
good night's sleep
hey who's that what come out
don't worry it's only me uh didn't we
lock you up
i was acquitted oh surprising what
no he wasn't i object come on and don't
let us catch you trying to escape again
who are you talking about sister
superior she haunts this place
she would only just leave us alone can i
talk to faith for a minute i'll just be
a sack
no faith please back to prison with him
move it you and this time stay in there
i'm not gonna get anywhere with them
this way i'm gonna have to get rid of
that ghost
first
so
so
ouch say what was all that about um
you had a tick look these are tick
pliers
oh thanks they're really bad here when
they get full they're as big as my fist
now i'm itching all over
so
something from the body of a descendant
now i should have everything
ah
damn it what the hell is going on now uh
what do i look like somehow i wanted to
be summoned
what do you think you'll get like three
wishes or something
no of course not i'm worried larry
laffer
i'm sister frigid sister superior frigid
just to be clear what do you want anyway
how come you're a ghost what do you
think because i'm
dead i figured that out but how did you
die plane crash
oh that explains why the cannibal
village is made out of airplane parts
do you think they had the parts shipped
in specially um
of course not i was the head of our
order looking after the many young girls
in our sisterhood our plane got caught
in a storm and crashed
did anyone actually land on this island
without being caught in a storm
fortunately all of my little lambs
survived
even my nephew otis but not me
i'm sorry that's life
why are you haunting the place you're
scaring the cannibals
and well they're ought those naughty
girls keep forgetting the word of the
lord
they'll sin if i'm not careful sure they
try
and they have misunderstood a few things
their holy book is a little
well i don't want to talk about it stop
scaring them all the time
no no it is my secret duty to lead my
flock onto the right path
what's life after death like it's not
what i imagined
i joined the order of the virgins of
saint aurelius
as a young woman all my life i
saved myself our lord and savior i knew
in heaven i would be united with him
you mean he'd really give it to you good
i didn't say
that you made it pretty clear between
the lines wishful thinking larry
oh you have a little ghost in your pants
more like a nasty little poltergeist oh
anyway
things in the afterlife don't work the
way i thought they would
don't worry i know exactly what it's
like to hope for a little sex
not get it and as a ghost that must be
especially difficult
but hey if you ever want to try it i'm
up for anything
it is written the world and its desires
pass away
but whoever does the will of god lives
forever i'm already here for eternity so
you could say you have nothing to lose
true enough maybe we could
the lust of the spirit and the last of
the flesh
don't seem to go together too bad i
can't take over a
physical body as a ghost i mean not that
i've ever tried
maybe i can help you with the whole
spiritual desire thing
how is that supposed to work i just have
to find a way to become a ghost myself
just you know what that means
maybe i can find a non-lethal way
if i do succeed will you leave your
flock alone to live as a wish
why not i have nothing to lose don't go
anywhere
so
i found the file oh how lovely i hope it
helps you find it
and that we can then both enjoy
exploring the cave
of course do you need anything else
oh i'll admit i'm a little bored but i
pass the time with my
fertile imagination and with planning
what little diversions to try next
did you know that you could have
extraordinary sexual experiences
where the mind leaves the body for a
short time
you said something about an out of body
experience how does that work
well it's very simple all you need
is an experienced device a what a
state-of-the-art device
that allows the mind to temporarily
leave the body
so it can get up to all sorts of
mischief
is there anywhere i can get one of those
around here i don't think there are any
in the archipelago
but i have a detailed description with
me
i have compiled a set of instructions
which allows one to build
just such an experience machine sir
what's that supposed to be a device for
downright
other worldly experiences you understand
master for those with exceptional tastes
i don't quite follow you it makes
ghostly encounters
possible or should i say encounters
as a ghost you leave your body behind
to find spiritual pleasures
that doesn't sound uninteresting however
during your journey you will need
someone to look after your abandoned
body
i would be delighted to volunteer my
services i love keeping an eye on bodies
well sounds sufficient here inside the
cell i am of course
useless the cell door isn't locked but
it is linked
to an alarm perhaps you might be skilled
enough to free me from my predicament
and then i would be more than happy to
assist you
in your tour of partial
much as i hate to do it i'll scan the
instructions into your blueprint app
larry
i'm afraid i have to run now oh what a
pity
i can't reach it
oops the alarm went off
now stay in your cell like our other
prisoner
what you little jerk can't think of a
funny line this time huh
i guess we finally broke you
it worked she thought the pig was
swingle but you did create a most
convincing image of me sir
quiet down there don't worry it's nice
and cozy here
and don't touch anything
one point
how exactly does this work now you need
to relax
oh i'm transparent it worked sir
now you're going in for some
supernatural experiences
i didn't think it would really work i
guess i should hustle over to sister
superior
hello sister oh were you in a plane
crash too
no i froze myself what of your own free
will
i don't have much time should we get
started i've waited long enough
then let's get it on wait how do you
take off ghost clothes
no need they are permeable
that's not so great for my condoms of
course don't worry
i can't get pregnant what about
contagious diseases
which ones do you have no not me it's
are you accusing me of having contagious
diseases
i don't know this is my first time as a
ghost
hello master don't start without me
swing oh what are you doing here oh
master larry you need me how else are
you going to have a threesome
nobody said anything about a threesome
oh my goodness i must somehow have
misheard
but since i'm here what kind of a nut
case are you can i lie between you two
swingle who's gonna throw me out now
i'll really die if nobody does that
can't we deal with this after the sex
you say out of this
fine then i'll just watch
i prefer it if you left can we finally
get started
i hope you haven't promised too much
uh
that was it well i don't know what else
you were expecting
even the other one was better hey well
i guess i didn't miss that much in this
world i wouldn't have had to hang around
here so long either
there's nothing keeping me here anymore
i can have bad sex in the afterlife too
goodbye larry
some people have expectations instead of
being happy to just have sex
well at least she's not hauling the
place anymore and what are you doing
here anyway
you're supposed to be keeping an eye on
me
ready
master you can't ask me to miss out on
an orgy
that was a sister superior and i that's
not an orgy
of course not because i wasn't there
damn it swingle
who's gonna get me out of the freezer
when you're half dead yourself
hmm someone pulled my body out luckily
in time
it wasn't me but someone saved me too
maybe one of those nice cannibal girls
came to our rescue
pie are you okay damn maybe i should
have taken you out of my pocket first
oh now you think of that i'm fine thank
you
good thing
not again guards take him away no
please listen to me it's about sister
superior
what about her i drove her away she
won't bother you anymore
what is that true i saw this ghostly
flash in the graveyard
that's true and sister frigid did not
admonish me when i
i don't want to talk about it no need to
thank me ladies
now take him away but my queen
if he really did defeat sister superior
maybe we should hear him out
there is nothing this
man has to say to us well i'm not
locking him up if he made sure that
sister superior won't disturb
bother me anymore exactly fine then
have your say
you have to remember me what are you
talking about
faith you're just pretending i can see
that you recognize me
although you do have to admit that all
women look at you angrily don't they
so you think she recognizes me too quiet
you
worm you should leave before i change my
mind and have you locked up again
come with me to a place where you can
get your memory back
as queen my place is here
certainly but you must visit the rest of
your domain
i will do nothing that you tell me to do
i'll do anything for you i don't care
now get out of my sight
it won't take long i'm not going
anywhere
i do though oh man you really are a
piece of work
if i come with you to this cave will you
leave me alone
of course and you'll never set foot on
our island again
sure all right let's go
larry you're really larry
hi we need to get you to a doctor no i'm
okay
it's probably just the humidity
you have any idea how all this stuff
works i didn't want to be here in the
first place
hold on i'll figure it out myself pie
help me no way you're on your own buster
i'm not putting my hand in there
i don't think i want to break that open
let's see what this does
this could be a machine that triggers
total self-awareness
hmm hmm
but how are we going to connect you to
this
i'm not sure this is such a good idea
the machine looks totally harmless but
we both agree that it's obviously not
from
earth
it's probably german engineering i don't
know
larry okay here's a compromise i'll only
turn the machine on for a moment
a compromise would be you not getting on
my nerves as bad as you did with your
timber score
but
you can't even remember that um wait
you remember everything yes damn it i
landed here on this island after the
storm where the tribe found me and
nursed me back to health
shortly after it all came back to me but
why did you come back and why did you
claim to have lost your memory
because i was happy here finally i
didn't have to deal with any
board members or investors i could just
be myself
and no men around to tell me how to do
things and then
all of a sudden you showed up so you
have no idea what's happened since then
no and i don't really care either
okay what happened after the explosion
in cancum
i wanted to eat a cookie i don't give a
damn about your cookies
i set up a cozy little apartment in the
basement of the ruins
sounds very cozy it was i wonder what
happened to all the underwear i had at
the villa
um i guess we'll probably never know
and how the hell did you end up on this
island
i got caught in a terrible storm
and then you were washed up here in the
archipelago just like i was
that's an incredibly unbelievable
coincidence
it's just fate so what have you been
doing on the island all this time
he's becky who she's a travel
instagramer
what not my shawnee she's a big packer
who is no never mind let's just forget
that
caused an oil spill why would you do
that
so i could grease the bird i call was it
was something i had to do to get my wrap
back
but and i needed that too
enough let's just drop it
scored with the governor bobby marley
she let you do that to her hey she
started it
actually i didn't really want to
tell me another one okay you're right
oh and i got my first stalker here on
the island too
huh some asian woman she even disguises
herself just so she can stay close to me
but i'm too intelligent not to notice
what who she even has
a submarine ah i give up
wait how did you end up getting caught
in that storm anyway
your pie phone sent me something my pie
phone oh there was something
when the storm hit it asked me who my
emergency contact was and the name that
came to mind was
larry laffer who else baby
the self learning a.i i thought the
algorithm had been destroyed
sunk with a pie phone i sent it to you
what did you do with it
did i leave it in my other pants
malfunction
six four seven three eight
hi i'm starting to worry about you
faith do you know what's wrong with her
i don't larry but that device now has my
secret algorithm stored on it
it can't fall into the wrong hands
there's no telling what might happen if
it did
that's perfect yikes oh great
miss les you seem to have regained your
memory
nice work larry thanks
do we have to have sex again we will
never
have sex again you two had sex
repeatedly it was needed you uh
really did need it baby shut up
enough i don't need you anymore larry
you've served your purpose
now i can deliver miss les to mr wang
and my mission is accomplished
who the hell is that the boss of prune
wash
well you could have come back instead of
enjoying yourself here with a tribe of
lesbian cannibals
larry you're simply impossible you're
the worst womanizer i know
come on now you're getting carried away
be quiet
she can't be allowed to know about the
algorithm can you swim
larry of course in lava
just let him go a fool doesn't know
anything
you don't have to get your hands dirty
with him oh i don't mind
on the contrary i'm going to enjoy this
no
don't larry
no
mari we have to start shipping
immediately
but we're still in the middle of the
beta test
the pipe is operational yeah it walks
that is to say it's not falling down as
much as it used to
then we can sell it but it still needs
to be certified by the authorities
what if there's a code fragment in there
that violates some specifications
i just found a malfunction that caused
the pie but to perform oral sex on a
gargoyle
if something like that happens the pie
bot could be taken out of the stores
and we would have to patch out the code
fragment i don't care we have to get the
pie box out
otherwise it'll all take too long
yanmai's on her way here now
we'll be able to retrofit the
self-learning ai
oh that's great of course
what no buts well some bugs
a new age is dawning nari and you
were there
soon i'll put an end to it too
are you finally awake
what happened they kidnapped faith then
they threw you into the volcano
even though i was yelling at them the
whole time you were lucky you landed in
an
old lava shaft instead of the hot stuff
they dropped you in here
you were knocked out when you hit the
ground how long ago was that
not long damn i have to go after them
where am i anyway according to my
sensors
this is an old kgb listening post and i
should take a look around
wow a
secret base in a volcano with a
helicopter
i always wanted one of those but it's
not yours
too bad but we could still take the
helicopter fly to new lost wages and
rescue
faith hey great idea we'll have to check
and make sure the helicopter
still works though it's been standing
around here for quite a while
and you said this is a kgb base you got
it the kgb was offering sightseeing
flights on a tropical island
no they were yes larry that's
exactly what they were doing sightseeing
flights
oh some of my stuff must have fallen
into the lava when we fell
better them than me then all my stuff
would be gone
mine
hi yeah yeah you've got pipe again
huh
you can never have too much juice
whoa thin glass i'll have to be careful
with that
the drawer is full of wires sorted by
land i'll take them with me
even if i could take off in the
helicopter as long as that waterfall is
well falling i can't get out of here
this must be where the helicopter's
engine goes wait
there's a plaque with specifications on
it i'll scan the blueprint for you
enough
okay let's see what it can do
the elevator has power now
no applications for the genius scientist
seeks willing assistant job opening
lazy bombs
someone finally showed up he said his
name was bj
seemed like a blowhard chased them away
this would all be a lot easier if i
could build myself some robot henchmen
i must devise a plan
the new bellhop at the hotel is a real
pain in the ass
i use the brainwave manipulator on them
shower thought maybe i could genetically
modify a flu virus and use it to
paralyze the whole world
my new intern vladimir is useless they
really will just let anyone into the kgb
these days i'm going to throw them into
the volcano
the waterfall controls were too
inconvenient for me
i have now switched to a clapping sensor
change the toilet flush to lava to save
water but burn my ass
changing it back
ah something's coming
oh a bucket always useful for any kind
of liquid
there's a tap on it but you can't open
it here
nice and stable
okay let's see what it can do
this will let me drain sewage water from
the tank
whoa kill to the brim
it looks like it works but i don't see
any switch to activate it
okay let's see what it can do
there's enough energy left for that
maybe i should be careful not to spill
anything on my fingers
i still need those
always helpful
that goes in there but then it keeps
falling out
so the test tube is secured in there
now to blow this thing
the heat work the glass
quack
that's fine just the way it is
so let's get this in there
it looks like it's not working and i'm
afraid i can't fix it without help
hello this is dr no no
is there someone in my secret
headquarters
it's vladimir your intern what
i threw you in the lava you're missed
fine i'll give you one more chance
but this time don't be so stupid
of course not
can you build me a nuclear energy
reactor
why don't you do it yourself i am having
my problems with that
shows you're just an intern not a genius
like me
that is why i am asking you all right
then it won't be like that send
everything up in the elevator
all that am out
i sent that junk engine up can you make
a nuclear engine out of it got it i'll
take a look at it
who did that that is not in accordance
with the standards
wait that doesn't belong there that's no
way to flange a b3
i did not install that like that oh man
what kind of bungler made this
connection what the hell is that
ball doing in there damn done
i'm sending the nuclear energy reactor
back down
thanks what do you want it for anyway uh
my python runs on nuclear energy
yo what my state of state-of-the-art
intelligence equipment it'll work
perfectly with my nuclear engine
ah something's coming
my first nuclear engine
then in it goes the helicopter has power
now
clap clap clap
candy things these clapping sensors now
i can take off
then it looks like we're ready for
takeoff you actually know how to fly a
kgb helicopter
don't i just have to tell an app where i
want to go you mean me like that hunter
only for helicopters so it's up to me
oh you can do that i can tell you what
to do
i just have to prepare something first
are you sure that's a good idea
i mean well you've been having some
problems for a little while there is
nothing wrong with me
i am fine oh sorry about that
no problem can you fly that thing not
yet i need a pilot program for a kgb
helicopter
i know kung fu what sorry wrong file
just a second
let's go
there's something stuck in the crack in
the cushions
a magazine called bear bushkas please
don't open it larry
yikes what's wrong i've forgotten women
used to look like that back then
look here warm and cozy even on the
outside
then again that was during the cold war
you know what this magazine is suited
for i can guess but i don't dare say
a wonderful way to pass a time and i
can't even turn myself off
or we'll crash you think that would be
enough to get into the mile high club
of course larry look the joystick
not looking
we're wobbling too much larry i'm trying
to keep everything under control
at the same time you could just focus on
one thing at a time
if i do that i won't be able to hold the
other stick
cool we made it to new lost wages did
you ever doubt it
now we have to fly to the broom tower
cool did you have them out
so
then we'll have to make another approach
do
do
oh
so we meet at last miss
less excellent work yanmai thanks so
faith where is the algorithm
talk uh mr wang
you'll never get your hands on the
algorithm it was destroyed
you're lying then ask your henchwoman
here
she destroyed it herself what
i think i there's something coming
towards us
the lava from kahlua destroyed the
algorithm i'm so sorry larry
but i won't forget your sacrifice is
that true
you're not i don't know what she's
talking about besides my mission was to
bring faith here
i threw that bloody guy in the lava but
where would he have gotten his hands on
an algorithm
dead we will keep you locked up here as
long as it takes you to reconstruct the
algorithm
there's something flying right at us
what's going on
is that larry is that
a kgb helicopter what
i knew you'd be the death of me super
agent larry
faith i've come to save you larry
i don't believe it oh my god
you killed your mind
it was self-defense that was twinkly
maybe she just stood too close to the
window larry
reboot required chop chop
not now pie leave the pie phone in your
pocket larry
wait a minute there's something wrong
with this pie phone
and face said the algorithm is in the
lava
something must have gone wrong with the
system update really
you don't think the algorithm had
something to do with it very
the algorithm didn't end up in the lava
because it's on that pipe oh
did that to me hey hands off hands
off the algorithm has become part of the
pi
software we have the missing piece of
the puzzle for
our new product now where is that
adapter again
data transfer initiated stop it you
don't know what you're doing
uh what exactly is he doing he's
transferring the self-learning algorithm
into that robot
as long as nothing happens to my pie
larry
your pie is a miracle the algorithm
merged with her but it didn't corrupt
her
your pie should have become powerful and
gone
insane that's what happened into all my
tests that's why i never published the
algorithm i don't understand what
prevented it from happening this time
but she'll be all right afterwards right
no larry the algorithm will be ripped
out of her and merged into this pie
board
to form a self-learning artificial
intelligence exactly the kind of ai
i've been trying to prevent your pie
will no longer exist
what that can't be allowed to happen
quiet what's what's happening to me
larry
bye she's gone larry but worse than that
they have the self-learning ai now boot
sequence complete
all systems operational larry how do i
know the ai is working
well if it's truly self-learning this
pie bot will become
more and more natural when it interacts
with humans she will grow
and change hello
hello nori it doesn't work that way
she has to be sexy she'll get that way
but it takes time i didn't build a robot
just so i could teach it
it has to go faster he doesn't
understand
what should we do now overpower i'll try
not another step larry take these two to
the dungeon
sorry yes right away
don't try anything stupid i have cameras
in every corner of the building
i won't miss a thing and you larry
you finished setting up the pie bot she
must be able to fulfill
even the most extraordinary wishes it's
the only way to get rid
of our pressure okay
i guess i'll have to find a new ninja
assassin and
call a cleaner
nari how can you work with them that
guy's a
total psycho there's no other way
he can see everything why if he's not
careful there may be resistance
you can't break out of here either
especially not when he can see
everything oh i'll never forgive you
nori
do as you're told and no harm will come
to you
larry what we have to break out
larry would catch us in a blink no she
was helping us
she's in league with them no she's not
she just couldn't tell us straight out
nari is evil and mean larry
she's helping us she's not evil she
disabled the security camera okay
if you say so we have to get out of
these cages somehow
there must be something to elrey's
prophecy after all
he gave me exactly the right key
oh damn now it's broken
how did you get out i have the key
i don't care where you got it just get
me out of here
wait faith i could unlock your cage too
the key has also turned to dust we're
free
not quite the dungeons below prune are
pretty extensive
i have no idea exactly where we are we
need to get out of here and find nari
maybe she left us some sort of clue
a note
good idea but that won't work
let's get out of here we can use the map
to find the way
are you sure
sure it's really easy to read
left right left left turn around left
hop in a circle down left and there we
are i'm not so sure that's right
no i'm not i have a perfect sense of
direction i'm not a woman
just follow me we'll see which one of us
gets there first
oh come on men just have a better
spatial sense than women
it's science we'll see larry
i'm not sending out a search party for
you then i'll just
go along you're in for a big surprise
faith i can't wait to see what nari has
planned
now let's see
this is so totally obviously the
shortest route
let's go
this looks familiar
uh
this place is very confusing
password one two three four five
wrong oh yeah so what's the right one
then it's uh
hey you're not gonna trick me that easy
i don't need one yes i am not yes i am
no
yes i am no oh
yes what do you mean yes passwords are
important
otherwise just anyone could walk right
in and what's the password
i don't care i'm not picky you can't
come in if you don't know the password
wait a minute i know you uh no
no way the revolution is way too deep
underground
we're all unknown and anonymous you're
the policeman who arrested me
um weren't you the second most handsome
man in new lost wages
the most handsome not now that larry
laffer's back in town
but see i was right it is you that
doesn't make any difference
we're anonymous you can't get in without
a password
have you already forgotten that women
worship the ground i walk on
no wonder i can smell your breath even
through the slit
have you forgotten that you couldn't
even stop me when i was locked up
of course i stopped you i escaped from
the cell
i don't want to talk about how i escaped
and cucumbers have
absolutely nothing to do with it but i
did
escape while you mr googly eyes
didn't even notice huh you still can't
get in without the password
open the door or i'll kick it in if you
create a disturbance here
i'll call the police in other words me
i bring a message from the revolutionary
cell and
um oh yeah where from
kahlua oh el camandante will want to
hear this come on in
el comendante
oh this is the old lab underneath
lefties where i woke up that day
wow so you finally found your way did
you
yes and as opposed to you i took the
official route
and did not take any shortcuts i just
read nari's map the way she meant it
it was meant differently i don't think
you're in a position to judge that
she drew it okay let's just drop it
what's the deal with this lab anyway i'm
not sure i searched the secret tunnel
system for some old deserted spot to set
up our headquarters a rundown factory
seemed like the ideal place
above it is a rundown bar somehow that
really doesn't surprise me
i have no idea what they used to make
here it could be a secret kgb
headquarters from back in the 80s
no they have more helicopters
so this is the revolution
not entirely but we still have to hope
that our smuggler gets through
we haven't heard from her i hope the
prune goons didn't catch her
she's carrying contraband that we really
need
how could you even work with that wang
guy i admit
at first he inspired me and swept me
along
but then i realized he was walking a
dangerous path
what is wang's plan every pie bot is
like a trojan horse
if mr wang succeeds in equipping every
household in america with a pie bot
it'll almost be as if he were there
himself his
puppets in every home and if the
self-learning ai works
the way it's supposed to oh it does we
saw that with larry's pie
now the software has found its way into
the pybot's sophisticated hardware
it will evolve even faster and become
much
more dangerous my adaptive ai will be
able to adapt to any situation
to every single person in its
environment while
serving as wang's eyes and ears my pie
would never have turned evil
wait a minute larry that's it what
i didn't realize which factor prevented
your pie from becoming evil
it was you i didn't do anything exactly
you didn't try to use her intelligence
for any evil purpose
and however the unusual
you may be you were just you and that's
more than enough baby but now mr wang
has the ai under his control
in a bunch of really hot looking robots
with sex routines that are incredible
i spent a lot of time on their
development and uh quality control
what is wine gonna do with them on the
one hand he'll have total control over
every household and on the other hand
a pie bot can use sex to make other
people compliant
larry you'd be the first person to buy
one of these
larry can i order one that looks exactly
like faith
larry i was just kidding i sure as hell
hope so i'll
see what i can do i heard that but it's
not even close to being the greatest
danger wang
underestimates what the ai could do with
the pybots they could start rebelling
against humans
develop their own super intelligence
decide that humanity is superfluous
the singularity i'd rather see the
singularity
what so what can we do yes
we need a plan to stop a global
conglomerate like prune
i've got it
we'll get a tank and just what are you
going to do with it well a long pipe is
never useless
he's right about that don't encourage
him we already have a plan
larry i don't think you've met el camin
dante
wait a minute i know that voice
lefty i mean uh lefto el comundante
lefto
i had to come back larry new lost wages
is in danger
all of mankind is in danger that's very
noble of you lefty besides
nari said that i can do the catering for
the prune canteen when it's all over
el comendante lefto knows everyone in
town
he can get anything he has informants
everywhere
thanks to him we have a chance so
what's the plan i didn't work on the
software for the pi bots
i programmed a virus instead i'd already
tested it on the decommissioned pi bot
here at headquarters but to transfer it
to all of the pi bots in the factory
i have to transfer it to the master
model first but i'll need a female to
female adapter to do that and i don't
have one
leave that to me i'm a specialist when
it comes to finding female parts
i'm afraid i have to agree the only way
we're gonna get one of these adapters is
from the dark net
i can explain that to you later larry
however i still need full access to
prune systems
i need a master password for that
don't you have one miss faith i had one
but it was stored on my pie
phone i don't memorize all my passwords
besides i had to leave all that to bj
so nobody would suspect anything and
bj's
dead what he's dead he died in the
explosion at my villa
the one you set off
it was self-defense what do you mean
okay it was an accident but bj is still
alive
i saw him after the explosion but i have
no idea where he is now
oh he's back in new lost wages he rang
the doorbell at prune and wanted his job
back
wang took him prisoner so i had to lock
him up the same way i did you guys
earlier
if i could remember exactly where in the
underground prison system i put him
he can stay there for all i care but we
need the master password from him
well at least he's close by hopefully he
hasn't forgotten the master password
so to recap we have to find out where
our smuggler is with the goods
we need a female to female adapter which
we'll have to get from the dark net and
we have to find bj
then we have to sneak into the prune
factory and upload my virus into the
primary pie bot so that it can propagate
and disable
and block all the other pybots and then
we have to destroy the ai so no one can
ever abuse it again
and then i get the commission for the
prune canteen
as good as done i'd like to believe that
hey nori
could you tell me the plan again
basically it's quite simple
we get female to female adapter from the
dark net to hack the pi bot and upload
my virus
we need the master password from bj to
get full access to the prune network
ah yeah very simple
why does wang have a golden cult it's
one of the more harmless things he has
you really don't want to know what else
i found in his office oh
i think that'd be interesting to hear no
even
you couldn't possibly begin to imagine
even worse than a unicorn in the
much worse
do you remember where bj was locked up
it was a prison cell beneath prune
getting there was rather complicated let
me see if i can piece it back together
anyway at first i went north
and ended up coming out of a door from
the north
i never turned around and went straight
back through the same door
i went each direction twice but the
second time
in the same direction was only after i
had already gone
once in each direction oh i almost
forgot the most important thing
never ever go counterclockwise
ah i'll give it a try
got it left and right uh not exactly
but you'll make it
what are we gonna do with the adapter
miss faith established
three laws of sex robotics at prune
first law
a pie bot must always be sexy larry
first law rule number one a pie bot may
not harm a human being
during sex that's implied second law
a pie bot cannot buy stock good raw
third law pie bots cannot exchange
information with each other
that's to prevent pybots from forming a
network and i'm afraid wang wants to do
just that so we need the adapter to
to connect our manipulated pi bot
directly to the central pi bot and thus
transmit the virus how does a female
female adapter work
you should know what a male-to-female
doctor looks like
you got that right baby you don't want
to know how many things i've adapted
myself
just like that but on both ends wow
you'd have to be pretty flexible
what was that darknet thing don't you
know what the dark net is
it's kind of like the internet i guess
at least that's not
all wrong the darknet is a disreputable
and dangerous place as illegal as it
gets
it's where you go to get the things you
need that aren't available anywhere else
now things are getting interesting you
shouldn't get caught doing it though
how do i find it you will need to go
through tour to get into the dark net
and how do i get there
it's pretty complicated as a matter of
fact that's not so easy to do right now
at least not since el caminonte
scribbled his crazy stuff all over my
directions
but you're a resourceful guy larry in
the dark net
you don't pay in dollars you pay in
cryptocurrency
the click coin cryptocurrency has really
skyrocketed recently
it's now accepted everywhere you need a
wallet for that
here
i've already created a fake account with
a large amount of funds for you for the
wallet to get the money you have to go
to the crypto cash machine in the
tunnels
but it has a defect the smuggler was
supposed to bring the spare apart
find her and install the part then you
can withdraw the cryptocurrency from
your wallet
so go and buy the adapter on the dark
net
it's as good as done great i knew i
could count on you
you get the spur apart from the crypto
cash machine from the smuggler she chose
the ladies room as her secret drop-off
point
you'll have to look for it in the
tunnels
what's the deal with this cryptocurrency
i don't know exactly who's behind it
supposedly the people have their
headquarters in a secret place far away
they must be real geniuses they're kind
of weird i beg your pardon
and nothing
what can you tell me about the smuggler
i'm worried about her
she should have been here by now maybe
she was followed and had to go into
hiding
how will i recognize her you'll know her
when you meet her in the ladies room
see you later see you later
it's a sign for the ladies room why is
it lying here
wait i just had to walk through that
door to get here that's so totally
complicated
i think i'm walking in circles
there's a sign missing
oh apparently this is the way to the
ladies room
that's a surprise i know i shouldn't go
in there but
we have to think more diversely
what no comment pie
oh i forgot that she
hello oh who are you
that depends on who you need me to be
sweetie
are you the smuggler oh honey do you
want me to do illegal things with you
uh i think i'll decide when the lights
come on
talk aussie you do remember me ducky
well let's just say
no it's better we just don't say
anything about what went on in new lost
wages jail
but we jailbirds sure had our fun
didn't we no i mean we're really not
gonna say anything about it
why are you standing in the shadows
larry please
look at all those glaring lights you can
see
all my little problem areas besides
some of the stuff i like to do is better
done in the dark
okay let's get down to business darling
exactly so you smuggled in something i
need
something to fix that weird cash machine
for that
thingy crypt currency cryptocurrency
something like that just to be safe i
stashed everything in a place
that's extra secure
please tell me it's not where i think it
is i really do hope we're thinking
along the same lines ah
so it's so it seems the time has
once again come for my cavity search
uh can't you just get it all out by
yourself
i'm a smuggler not a contortionist
besides i know you love it sweetie i
just hope your hands are
warmer this time oh
let's get this over with
ah there's nothing there oh you're
headed in the right direction
yes getting warmer so are your hands
as well got it what's this
how is this supposed to help me with the
cash machine oh
that's my backstage pass for the lady
gag concert
and believe me i was so backstage honey
well at least it's not cucumbers again
keep looking
wait there's right
i've got it okay
that's you need it for the crypto cash
machine
every time i think i understand this
world a little better
something like this happens and i can't
even ask pie to explain it to me
wait wasn't the door to the ladies room
here a minute ago
wait haven't i been here before
hmm locked
now i've unlocked it
pretty heavy it must be loaded
not working there's still something
missing
you have to put something in there but
it sure isn't going to be my hand
how'd that go again the blockchain has
to be inserted here
now the wallet is full to the brim
huh
ah
this place is very confusing
i think i'm walking in circles
this looks familiar
dj is that you leave me alone
did they torture you did they ever they
said
they didn't need me anymore and locked
me up here
i meant physically and so on it didn't
even bother with that
i'm irrelevant say do you by any chance
remember
the prune master password from back in
the day when
you were ceo oh so that's why you're
here
you want to use me the great larry
laugher first he blows the most
important keynote of my career
then he blows up my villa that belonged
to faith and now he doesn't want to free
me
no he wants the master password for me
and what makes you think i just give it
to you like that
for the fight against oppression yeah
i'm definitely being oppressed here but
that still doesn't explain why i should
tell you the password
now go away leave me alone i'm the
victim here
a prisoner of the system he's got the
whole drama thing sewn pat
what happened to you you left cam come
so suddenly
out of the goodness of my heart i wanted
to help this good-for-nothing bartender
fix up his pathetic bar
how does he thank me he chases me away
and then my yacht got caught in a huge
storm
it sank and i ended up on this island at
this really weird hotel
that is one persistent storm
i thought to myself this washed up
island has potential but it needs
something to draw people here there was
some legend about a cavern of cosmic
cognition
and i immediately thought bam a galactic
festival and then it all went wrong
due to circumstances beyond my control
of course of course
so i took the last boat back to new lost
wages
i thought to myself if anyone
appreciates my experience and my talent
then it's my old company doesn't look
that way
now go away
listen
we all know what a genius you are well
you're right about that i wasn't able to
reach my full potential when i was at
prune
but you were before faith hired you you
were
an actor yeah so what
you should have won an oscar for the
prune gig you really think so
you were a totally convincing ceo i
would have bought
any pie phone you ever produced thanks
finally someone appreciates my efforts
faith was always so critical i make one
small mistake in the city
and she turns it into a major drama
you've had a really rough time bj
someone like you belongs at the head of
prune someone who knows the master
password
of course i know the master password
it's
you nearly had me fooled larry but the
revolution needs it
what revolution the resistance movement
that can swang
hmm who's behind it
you have to step up to head up the
movement you're not wrong there
nobody knows prune better than i do no
one's a better
organizer than i am and i've got a score
to settle with prune
that's what i'm telling you but just
answer me one more question larry
and i'm in sure if you really think i'm
the right man to lead the revolution
of course and you know me so well
best buddies and we share the most
intimate secrets so what the hell
right then i'm sure you know when it's
my birthday
on a 12. you're right oh really that
doesn't surprise you now does it huh
you did know it or should i ask the
question again no
no it's all fine the revolution needs
you
then i shall heed the call now all i
have to do is get you out of that cage
no need it's unlocked what they forgot
to lock it
then why didn't you just leave because i
don't feel like anyone takes me
seriously
they don't even bother to lock me up all
the more reason for me to stay here
uh okay but i think you should come with
me
okay okay fine
bj bj mr jobs
i found him don't worry people i'm here
now
and for now our odds have gone
way up our larry you were supposed to
get the master password
okay from now on you all report directly
to me
not him
his cell was unlocked too bad he's here
now we'll just have to live with it
just make sure he doesn't leave this
room team
status update we need the master
password first
oh of course it's storefront unpaved
oh yeah i remember now okay larry we've
we've got that cleared up i'm ready to
take a closer look at the plans for our
revolution
where can i find everything uh mr jobs
maybe you could just wait back there a
bit
i'll get everything ready great
lefty uh leftover el come on dante
have you brewed a revolution beer yet
not yet but i already have many ideas
for it i'd like to combine the typical
taste of new lost wages
with an exotic touch pineapple
ah no it's a very special kind of cactus
that i discovered it can come did you
get it from el rey
oh you know this cactus only too well
who made you the leader of the
revolution anyway nori
nori seems quite capable to me she had
to maintain her cover at prune
she was the only one who could get us
the inside information
that sounds surprisingly reasonable and
understandable besides
i would have to have shaved off my
mustache
and now you don't anyway i'm the one who
knows the tunnel system under new last
wages like the back of my hand
in other words you've always been
smuggling stuff down here
that was self-defense against the
authorities i've always been a
revolutionary so to speak no more petty
criminal
when did you start smoking i don't
really smoke
but you are the revolution requires
many sacrifices yeah but
does it have to be the air we breathe
do you really need the eye patch my
girlfriend thinks it makes me look
dashing
you have a girlfriend hopefully you're
not talking about that broken robot back
there
hmm would that bother you a little
how did i get into the darkness it's not
easy larry
the dark net is even harder to find in
these tunnels than the hq
you need perfect absolutely infallible
directions
so tell me larry i'm not a man of many
words
i'm more a visual guy the motto of my
sex life
ah too much information
what else can you tell me about the dark
net not so loud larry
you don't want to talk about the dark
net we're deep underground lefty
they have ears everywhere what exactly
do you have to do with the dark net
larry you may think i'm a simple
bartender
but the truth is i'm
tunnel digger no larry i'm an
entrepreneur
what kind of manure businessman larry
i'm even a serial entrepreneur i don't
understand a word you're saying
what is that supposed to mean i founded
tons of companies and they all went
bankrupt
but to start those companies i had to
get a ton of material from
dark sources the dark net exactly
the things you can find there you can't
even begin to imagine
now that just makes me more curious than
ever
i have to go the revolution will not
wait
i was wondering if you draw directions
to the dark net on here of course
my directions to the headquarters
obviously worked
and i didn't even have time to finish
them
and that really didn't lead you into the
pit of death
no i got here in one piece hmm good
thing too
give me that and i'll map out the way to
the dark neck for you
one that uh avoids the pit trap
it's a real downer
here ah thanks
it'll be child's play for you
but remember you have to go through tour
to get into the darknet
that's what nari said too huh you're a
resourceful guy
she said that too
these are the directions from el
camadante
so
oh
this looks familiar
ah
i think i'm walking in circles
so
hmm
ah
you will need to go through tour to get
into the dark net
welcome to the leisure sweet dark net
what can i do for you today
what is this place the leisure sweet
dark net
a place where you can find the most
exotic products to satisfy
even the most extraordinary tastes our
products
let you soar to the highest heights life
has to offer
or plunge into the deepest abyss the
leisure sweet dark net is a franchise of
the leisure suite
new lost wages corporation registered
to be a fuse the dark net must be
located directly under the leisure suite
where's b be a foos split with the
prototype of the fuck-o-matic deluxe
version too
or did the prototype split
or did she do the splits
at any rate she's not there right now
the developers probably thought it was
too much effort to hire the voice over
artist for this nonsense sounds
reasonable
please select a product
only one product left in stock how would
you like to pay
with my bulging wallet
transaction complete enjoy your product
please come again soon
it's a good thing i know a lot about
technology
so
larry yes how are you doing
all done i've got bj's master password
and the adapter from the internet
great uh i knew we could count on you
right miss faith
hmm yes that's right so what's next
i've already loaded my virus onto the
pie but here at hq
now we take our virus spot to the
factory
and use the adapter to connect it to the
pie bot there
and if the pie bot won't allow that i
mean if this ai
is as smart as you say it is will he let
you do that to him the virus is sexually
transmittable
so we have to make wang's pybot find our
virus spot attractive
and
and then bang and how the two bots will
merge like you did with
scrooney corn i'm not real crazy about
that comparison
a data transfer of the intimate kind
if my pie could have seen all this but
she's gone
are you sure there's no chance she still
exists somewhere
well i don't want to get your hopes up
the moment
wang tore the algorithm out of her she
would have backed herself
up and and if she was functioning as an
ai
the way she apparently usually did you
mean my pie might still be on a pruned
surface somewhere
to find out i'd have to scan the entire
system
what are we waiting for larry i can't do
that until we've defeated
wang then let's get a move on okay let's
get the virus spot
to the factory mr wang may have already
started transferring the ai to the other
models
let's go let's get our virus bot to the
factory and put a stop to wang
come on faith larry yeah
can't do it i'm going
out for some cigarettes larry at first i
was really mad at you for destroying
what i built at prune
then i settled in on the island and you
showed up
again you brought my algorithm to the
one place it shouldn't be
but i realize now that you did all of
that for me sure you made yourself look
stupid
clumsy and impertinent but you meant
well
of course and now we'll take prune back
i don't want prune back anymore i had
everything i needed on the island i want
to go back
and larry you could come with me
i have to save pie that may be but
i have to listen to what my heart tells
me this is not my place
i'm sorry larry
she really left
larry we have to right we have to stop
wang
once and for all
damn it where the hell is nari i have no
idea mr wang
i didn't ask you wait did you just
talk to me like a normal human being
of course i did am i not human enough
for you
the a.i works you were
baby why are you still dressed oh
you work perfectly there's no reason to
wait for nari
we will take on the world
what's the problem now wang has
activated the transfer to the pie bots
he's ignoring faith's law of sexual
robotics the pie bots are all networked
but
that will also help our virus spread if
we can get it into the system
now the security protocol is in effect
hold on a second i almost have it
very nice so many pie bots
we just need to pack them up and deliver
that makes me
real hot
what
larry what what are you doing
it's over wang hey i was about to throw
out a cool line
oh sorry larry what was it you're fired
doesn't really do it for me to be honest
should i try another one
larry i trusted you
and now i'm gonna stop you
you call her beautiful we thought long
and hard about what the first model
should look like
if this reproduction of a famous pianist
doesn't suit your taste
well it's all modular and customizable
i have to admit that doesn't sound all
that bad
larry i bet you can't even get me a beer
ah she could even get you several cakes
at the same time
does she even know how to cook we will
upload the cooking routines as a
wireless update
i'm afraid there's going to be a slight
delay though
because first i'll have to hire a new
technical director
the current one is about to die a tragic
death
i think he means you
i wish she would leave me alone and so
she will
because there is not going to be
anything left of you when she's done
i bet even the fellatio routines aren't
that good oh you
really think so well i did spend a lot
of time and energy on those
not now nori let me show you what she
can do
you fellatio program 8a now
i'd love nothing more
see oh
that is a self-learning a.i
oh and how
she learns
oh that's a little ah
rough hey easy easy
what's happening to me
ugh
it was always full of hot air anyway
nori what happened exactly what faith
feared
the ai has developed its own
consciousness
she's dangerous deadly and horny
hello larry i'd like to
get to know you better no way
oh
nori nori she passed out the pie bot has
to connect to our virus spot
hey look wouldn't she make a great
friend for you
larry i only have eyes for you
why would i hang out with such an
inferior model when there's
you i have to run
i really don't think she'd like that
i'm not touching that
golden access cards make me feel really
important
good day to you too
so
here comes the elevator
i'm afraid even my ever popular
mouth-to-mouth resuscitation wouldn't
help
i'll take the bottle out
in case i ever need to christen the ship
i can't get any of that on my fingertips
or in my pants
hmm you think wang uses this to launch
nuclear missiles
or is it the self-destruct button what
the hell
let's give it a try oh
it just started the computer
hmm looks like wang is already playing
the second version of the pie bot
improved facial makeup an arm with
enhanced satisfaction function
slimmer calves improve nuclear engine
my fingertips tickle when i touch it
time to get out of here
unfortunately i can't just yank it off
it's not rusty enough
the locks completely corroded
oh i've been in this room before i fell
from there
onto the stage and then there was an
explosion
that was something in a way i'm kind of
proud of that
lick er the pie bot loses a lot of value
the second you open it
oh that definitely watered the shrunken
hand
that's definitely too high
the scanner won't accept my magnificent
hand
it worked it's open
amazing the way i keep finding cups full
of a yellow liquid everywhere i go
all bone not even skin not my thing
i always like to have spare body parts
with me just in case
welcome to the prune meadowtron a
station for the fully automated
performance
of medical procedures how can i be of
assistance today
time to get ready for dr larry
that extended an armrest
thank you for choosing meadowtron please
come again
soon
welcome to the prune meadowtron a
station for the fully automated
performance of medical procedures
how can i be of assistance today
please select a program available
programs
flu vaccination radiation therapy
emergency cesarean section all right
let's see
you have selected flu vaccination
the flu vaccination is statistically
speaking
a harmless procedure after which
corrective surgery is only really
necessary
after vaccination the skin may rotten
and you may feel a little worn out in
addition to the flu vaccine
you will be injected with a prune
monitoring chip
for your own safety the prune safety
protocol
recommends this procedure
no procrastination with vaccination
vaccination
process initiated
program completed thank you for choosing
meadowtron
please come again soon
thank you for choosing meadowtron please
come again
soon
a bottle of doom paragnon with a needle
in the
cork
welcome to the prune meadowtron a
station
for the fully automated performance of
medical procedures
how can i be of assistance today
that retracted the armrest amazing
technology
thank you for choosing meadowtron please
come again soon
i hope that cup doesn't tip over
welcome to the prune meadowtron a
station for the fully automated
performance of medical procedures
how can i be of assistance today
you have selected radiation therapy
this process uses strong nuclear
radiation
please protect your testicles if present
are you certain you would like to start
the program
if this game series keeps up the way
it's been going i won't need my
testicles anyway
radiation therapy initiated
program completed thank you for choosing
meadowtron
please come again soon
thank you for choosing meadowtron please
come again soon
hmm nice and warm now welcome to the
prune meadowtron
a station for the fully automated
performance of medical procedures
how can i be of assistance today
you have selected emergency cesarean
section
this type of treatment should only be
used in an extreme
emergency such as for example
if an alien parasite is growing
inside you and you want to remove it
prophylactically the prune safety
protocol
strongly advises against this treatment
this could lead to unexpected side
effects
for instance sudden death slow
death agonizing death mutilation
followed by death death followed by
mutilation
itching would you like to run the
program anyway
i've done stupider things cesarean
section
initiated
the cesarean section sure take a long
time
a chainsaw that doesn't need gas this
changes everything
bullseye
i don't even want to touch that grinning
mug but there's nothing i can do about
it
right
energy for more than just a hot night
a high torque tongue
oral in the third degree
now those are attractive legs
now he looks kind of painted
what is that look isn't she state of the
art are those new features
i haven't even really been released yet
and there's an improved version of me
i'm obsolete that fast i have to update
my firmware to this new version
but how what a coincidence i
happen to have a female to female
adapter warning
condom firewall detects virus oh
damn it this is not an improved version
oh i think it is you try to trick me
with this thing hey that took a lot of
work
all i want to do is take care of you the
way you took care of wang
i i don't think i want that oh
larry
hi are you still in there somewhere what
do you want with this outdated version
i don't wanna die what do you mean
die you'll love it
hey baby uh how's it going oh
fine can i get you your slippers i mean
why don't we spend some quality time
together
we'll be united hmm the pie bots are
programmed to respond to pickup lines
but faith's algorithm lets them develop
a will of their own
like my pie it creates a conflict within
her that i can take advantage of
finally a chance to show off my skills
did it hurt when you fell from heaven no
i landed on you
that's how you got your brain damage i'm
sorry baby i didn't mean to tease you
pull yourself together
i think it's working but i have to keep
going
since i don't have a horse at the moment
can i ride you
the only horse oh larry you're so
funny can i do something good for you in
a moment
the algorithm will stop working entirely
and the old programming will be restored
i'm doing this for you pie you're not
gonna be able to handle this baby
are you a parking ticket because you've
got fine
written all over you
i think it worked no it didn't i found
some program code that's perfectly tuned
to your needs
you have no power over me like the
others i will suck you dry
and i'm going to do it slowly very
slowly uh
that's not the kind of sucking i like
you will
suffer so come on then take my libido
but i hope you've got a big appetite
because i have lived a
long life and i have seen a few things
take it
take it all baby have it
you have it all
larry wake up breakfast is almost ready
another new day for larry laffer as
always
after a hot night
it's gonna be another perfect day today
are you going to come
only if you don't come first
swinging alone is boring
i'm not putting that on now
hey larry
hello uh don't you remember my name
uh pine piper piper of course
did you have trouble sleeping you look a
little out of sorts
no i'm fine everything's perfect
as usual that's good to hear i hope last
night wasn't
too much for you on the contrary i can't
get enough of you pie
piper well you're just going to have to
be patient for a little bit
first it's time for your favorite
breakfast
lovingly prepared by myself not by some
maid or something
scrambled eggs with crispy fried bacon
along with
fresh orange juice freshly pressed by
naked women
this has to be a dream tell me how do
you know that this is my favorite thing
in the whole world
i'm a good listener babe i i don't
remember telling you
i do everything i can to make you happy
larry
and you do too i know baby we're both so
happy here
what do you want outside babe stay here
with me
no that would ruin my suit
i don't have time to lie around in the
sun
i don't want to just hang out on the
couch right now
it's noon larry you know what that means
oh yeah
strip down baby it's time for your
massage
my hands long to feel your feet no
tickling and let's not forget the happy
ending
not a chance and of course you'll need a
massive erection purple nurple to go
with it
baby you read my mind after all you
don't have any appointments
and soon i'll be just a wee bit tipsy
why don't we just get started
oh i must have fallen asleep after that
massage
no wonder after that kind of
relaxation hey sleepyhead
i took brutus for his walk hope you had
a good rest
and that you're hungry i hope you're
ready for your favorite meal
meatloaf made from local ingredients
great well then why don't you sit down
at the table
wasn't that good now you can take a
break and digest a bit
but don't go away there's another
surprise waiting for you
and it's in the bedroom
good dog
pretty flowers
everything looks fine the way it is
larry could you come into the bedroom
funny i was just there a moment ago
i've been waiting for you i hope the
meal didn't wear you out
oh i wouldn't worry about that as you
can see
all our toys are ready for action just
choose whatever turns you on
is today a latex suit day or would you
prefer
the swing or maybe both and afterwards
you'll be so tired you'll fall asleep
cuddled up against me
piper this is the best day of my life
i'm so happy to hear you say that larry
tomorrow could be just as fantastic
exactly the same
and the day after forever i can't
imagine
anything better
larry
larry
larry
what is someone calling me is that piper
no
she's asleep
someone's knocking at the door
who is it then
hello larry i found you
thank god who's there it's me faith
faith why are you visiting us in the
middle of the night
listen very carefully larry we haven't
got much time
if piper finds out i'm here she'll reset
the simulation
what simulation piper's alive larry but
she won't let you out
i don't understand a word you're saying
you have to do what i say
understand well i don't know it
piper is using an old simulation routine
i developed many years ago at prune
that simulation has a back door she
doesn't know that
back door get a hold of yourself okay
okay
sorry you have to find the magic marker
in the basement
you hear me basement magic marker find
it
what does it do oh she's coming hurry
larry
otherwise you'll lose yourself in the
simulation larry
what are you doing down here faith
pi what's a magic marker damn initiate
reboot
larry wake up breakfast is almost ready
another new day for larry laffer as
always after a
hot night it's gonna be another perfect
day today
are you going to come
only if you don't come first that was a
weird dream hey larry
hello piper did you have trouble
sleeping
you look a little out of sorts no i'm
fine
everything's perfect as usual that's
good to hear
i hope last night wasn't too much for
you
on the contrary i can't get enough of
you pie
piper well you're just going to have to
be patient for a little bit
first it's time for your favorite
breakfast
lovingly prepared by myself not by some
maid or something
scrambled eggs with crispy fried bacon
along with
fresh orange juice freshly pressed by
naked women
this has to be a dream i do everything i
can to make you happy larry
and you do too i know baby
we're both so happy here
uh piper why is there a huge lock on the
door it's for our safety
to protect us from intruders and stuff
don't worry about it
hmm locked there's no way i can open
that
i can't tear that off
please leave the key where it is larry
hammer time
it's noon larry you know what that means
oh yeah
strip down baby it's time for your
massage
my hands long to feel your feet no
tickling and let's not forget the happy
ending
not a chance and of course you'll need a
massive erection purple nurple to go
with it
um
oh i must have fallen asleep after that
massage
no wonder after that kind of
relaxation hey sleepyhead
i took brutus for his walk hope you had
a good rest
and that you're hungry i hope you're
ready for your favorite meal
meatloaf made from local ingredients
how about pizza today beds and uh
unusual idea but unfortunately i don't
have any cash in the house right now
so we couldn't pay for a pizza that's
okay i have this coupon
that's unexpected there's nothing wrong
with that is there
no no not at all okay fine i'll order us
a pizza
and you know what's waiting for us
afterwards
a bedroom full of toys
and you get to choose what we want to
play with if
i have to
that must be the pizza hold on i'll get
it
okay larry the pizza's here we can eat
now
babe you have to get out of the house
i'm locked out of the simulation
but you all let me out there must be a
way
a back door in the simulation back door
mary okay okay i'll have a look around
find the magic marker got it i have to
get out of here before she notices me
again
it can be pushed to the side and there's
something behind it
the magic marker how do i know that
i've never seen it before someone told
me about it
someone told me she means a lot to me
what am i supposed to do with it now
larry what are you doing down here
i thought this was our sex dungeon would
a sex dungeon make this day more perfect
for you
no actually i really don't know why i
just said that
it can't be helped initiate reboot
larry wake up breakfast is almost ready
another new day for larry laffer as
always after a
hot night it's gonna be another perfect
day today
are you going to come
only if you don't come first larry
what who
faith whoa you look
gorgeous
get yourself together larry you're with
piper
larry that doesn't matter right now you
are so
close to the magic marker larry if you
use it on the front door
you can break free pie keeps locking the
simulation down
you have to keep trying don't let her
keep you here forever
listen to me you need to get pie out of
the house
only then will it be safe for you to go
down to the basement and get the magic
marker
but what's this all about i i mean i'm
so glad that pie is alive
but you're not alive larry not here
she spotted me the pool larry there are
strange signals coming from the pool
you have to
hey larry hello piper did you have
trouble sleeping
you look a little out of sorts no i'm
fine
everything's perfect as usual that's
good to hear
i hope last night wasn't too much for
you
on the contrary i can't get enough of
you pie
piper well you're just going to have to
be patient for a little bit
first it's time for your favorite
breakfast
lovingly prepared by myself not by some
maid or something
scrambled eggs with crispy fried bacon
along with
fresh orange juice freshly pressed by
naked women
this has to be a dream i do everything i
can to make you happy larry
and you do too i know baby we're both
so happy here uh piper whatever happened
to our basement door
we've never had a basement door that
wall has always been there don't worry
about it
i don't know if i really want to touch
that
it's got the phone number of the pool
cleaning company on it
they also provide pool service the phone
number is printed on there too
thanks for calling this is to confirm
your pool treatment for tomorrow
we will deliver the necessary pump to
your property today
we thank you for your confidence in us
goodbye
i'll pour some of it in there but that's
not enough food for him
i'll put the bone in it
now let's see now which channel do i
tune into
should i leave the tv on
it's noon larry you know what that means
oh yeah
strip down baby it's time for your
massage
my hands long to feel your feet no
tickling and let's not forget the happy
ending
not a chance and of course you'll need a
massive erection purple
nurple to go with it
yikes man that's loud it worked piper's
still walking brutus
i have to hurry
let's see if it really does drain the
pool well it looks like it's going to
take a while to pump it all out
there's nothing i can do with that
it doesn't have an off switch
if i stick my fingers in there they're
gone
i can use this to block the fan
now the graphics card is burnt out
broke as hell
it can be pushed to the side and there's
something behind it
it must be that magic marker faith was
talking about i shouldn't let pie catch
me carrying it around
dave are you there yes larry here
take the magic marker i can't use it
from outside the simulation
you have to do it yourself but i can
throw the magic marker in the backyard
so pie won't notice
all right
i took brutus for his walk hope you had
a good rest
and that you're hungry i hope you're
ready for your favorite meal
meatloaf made from local ingredients
great well then why don't you sit down
at the table
wasn't that good now you can take a
break and digest a bit but don't go away
there's another surprise waiting for you
and
it's in the bedroom
this is where faith through the magic
marker great i'll take it with me
i can throw it up there
oops i cut it off
not really all that clever making it
flammable
larry could you come into the bedroom
funny i was just there a moment ago
i've been waiting for you i hope the
meal didn't wear you out
oh i wouldn't worry about that as you
can see
all our toys are ready for action oh
there seems to be something wrong with
them imagine that
well i guess it wouldn't matter if
justice once
we didn't have sex today but larry we
could at least have
normal sex i have a headache leave
me alone all right all right
well then good night
i think she's asleep i have to be quiet
i have to be careful not to wake her up
larry do you have the magic marker yes
i'm opening the door now hurry that will
interrupt the simulation
what is going on here hi my name is
piper i'm not gonna let this happen
initiate reboot hi i can't reboot the
simulation anymore the magic marker has
corrupted the system
you have to end the simulation piper you
know larry doesn't belong here
what have you done why am i here oh
larry
i just wanted us to be together you're
alive
you could have been transferred back to
a pie phone but it wouldn't have been
the same
when wang copied the algorithm out of me
i stayed in the prune system
the ai is still part of me larry it
merged with me
i had access to all the routines every
camera in the tower i knew that at some
point you would
connect with the pi bot even sex robots
can't resist me
so i thought once you were with me in a
place that was
perfect for you
why did you keep resetting i just wanted
to give you the perfect day
no hassles a day where everything went
just right
again and again until you no longer
cared about your old life and
you could just be happy happy in a
simulation pie
isn't that what i am a simulation no
you're so much more oh larry
you could have just explained everything
to me but then you wouldn't have stayed
with me
what makes you think that what do you
think because i don't have a body
even if i had taken over one of the pie
bots i would never have been able to be
what you wanted me to be
don't say that we can leave the
simulation now
together you still don't get it
what did the magic marker do it's magic
okay
that's explanation enough for me did i
just dream about faith
no she hacked into the simulation i
couldn't stop her
she knows the system too well it's true
pie you have to let larry go now no
he's staying with me forever and ever
listen to yourself
my ai changed you corrupted you you can
feel it can't you
i i a woman really wants to be with me
in reality
a woman really wants to be with me in
virtual reality
i have to admit that kinda makes me
horny
just shut it larry just shut it larry so
what's the next step
pie has to end the simulation and then
you wake up back out there
and then we can copy pie from the prune
system back into a pie phone
right larry i don't know how to say this
let me say it faith faith's
self-learning ai
must be destroyed once and for all yes i
am the self-learning ai but we're going
to destroy all the pie bots
and the ai will still be a part of me
pie
there's no other way larry you won't be
safe until the ai is completely erased
no i won't let you do this you don't
have a choice
you have to no pie no no
larry i can't tell you how grateful i am
i was just a digital assistant but now
now you're my pie and you always will be
if there's anything else you want to say
to me now's the time
i will never forget you and i'll never
forget you
larry it's time larry my programming
won't allow me to erase myself
you'll have to do it goodbye
goodbye
b
larry how are you are you still yourself
i i what larry
i had to delete pie it was the right
thing to do
i know but it's so pointless nori
was pie able to make a backup of herself
without the algorithm
no she's gone for good larry faith i'm
sorry larry i know how much she meant to
you
i'll never forget her but tell me
why are you here you said you wanted to
leave
i couldn't i realized i'd forgotten
something
you are unaware no larry
you you've done so much for me sure
maybe not everything was quite as clever
as it could have been but you never gave
up
and you always wanted to help me i knew
you'd never pull off this crazy plan
without me
oh i was doing okay you would have
stayed in that simulation forever
you don't know that for certain yes i do
in any case i just couldn't give up on
you
abandon you to your fate we really did
it
the algorithm is finally destroyed the
pie bot's no longer a threat
that's right the world must continue to
exist without intelligent sex robots
i'm pretty sure we'll figure it out
somehow so where does that leave us
i don't know larry for the time being
all we can do is leave this
dreadful factory i think we can manage
that
what happens after that the future
hasn't been written yet larry
this is the door opener right
who would have thought the time has
finally come
i just wish pie could have lived to see
this day
i'll light another candle for her now
elzadi el rey
i'm sorry i'm not going to be marrying
your daughter i hope she's not too mad
at me right now
well elari she wasn't too thrilled with
the idea
in fact she fled the island even before
you did
so the wedding was off no i had a
cardboard cutout of her maid
with a heavy veil at least then on paper
you would have married my daughter and
fulfilled the prophecy
how comforting and where is your
daughter now
she flew to new lost wages to open a
league for wrestling alpacas
i don't know if the gringos are going to
be interested in that oh i'm sure
they'll be thrilled
and it doesn't bother you that i'm not
fulfilling the prophecy
but you are what i adopted faith
she's now my daughter and she went along
with that
oh she got the rest of the island in
return
you're an excellent this is man already
thank you
i think i'll go get married
well larry how are you feeling
ready i mean you're always ready right
you and i were made for each other baby
it's time for a wedding my darlings dear
friends
and lovelies we are gathered here today
because
there is nothing more beautiful than
this
outfit don't i look absolutely stunning
um and of course while two lonely hearts
have come to join and become one
giant heart hey isn't that the same
speech you gave at the last wedding
honey
i have a lot to do i can't dance a
different tango for every wedding do you
have the rings
larry
rings we don't need to be that formal
so my lovelies are you two ready to
join in the bonds of matrimony
yes i am
yes about time too
and by the power vested in me by the
internet
i now pronounce you man
and wife then can i kiss the bride now
that
and much much more where would you like
to go on our honeymoon
oh we're already going to be living
together in the most perfect place
imaginable
so we might as well head straight there
besides
a queen shouldn't leave her cannibals
unattended for too long
sounds good to me muffington island is
quite homey once you learn to ignore the
plane wreckage in the bones
larry you know i'm not going to give you
that perfect day my life's not going to
be centered around making your life as
comfortable as possible
and i'm not going to stand in the
kitchen all day for you
but you have to admit it would be
perfect for me but
but it's not just about me damn right
well well
larry laffer who would have ever thought
you're married now and nothing's gonna
fall on your head this time
and we have tax advantages too what do
you think the future holds in store for
us
don't say a word larry i know exactly
what you're thinking
sure as if i'm that predictable
you